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Grandparent Alert: Pertussis (Whooping Cough) is on the rise and you can help! →

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  • From Stanley Tucci on Connecting with Grandchildren

    If you live close enough have them come regularly to eat and sleep over. This works really well until they reach 6th grade. After that hey then are so involved with after school activites and friends. However, not too much time will lapse and they realize they miss those times and then call and ask can we come over for Sat. dinner and sleep over.

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  • From Eleanor Best on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    This reading is alot like the feelings I had when my grandmother died in 1990. She was 80 and I was a mother of 3 and aged 39. No matter how old you are the closeness you have with that one person which was my Granny never goes away. I could not even think of her passing for at least the first ten years after her death without crying. I was named after her and was so close that there was a constant ache in my heart whenever I would think of her. I still miss her and hope that I can be a wonderful grandmother to my grandbabies as she was to me. I have one little grandson that is 20months old by my daughter and am expecting a little granddaughter in November by my son. I had such a positive and wonderful Grandmother and know I will see her again one day.

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  • From alexis piper on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    my grand father died on my birthday this year. And i dont know what to do. I don’t think that he knew i loved him very much but i did. and the day after my birthday my mom was talking to my grandma and saying stuff i cant remember but i knew it was bad news and i ws wondering if someone had died or something so i asked my mom and she said i will tell u the news tomorrow but i was eager to know but i waited any way. But when i heard this news i didnt know what to think. i cryed for like 5 minutes and stopped. my mom asked if i was ok she asked if i was in shock or something and i said no i’m fine. All i could think about was this is worse than when my aunt heidi died they both died of cancer.I still cry now but i knnow he is not in pain any more cause he is in heaven with my aunt heidi and god. I miss u poppy so much and i luv you to! Love, lexi

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  • From mark smith on Survey: Are Today's Parents Overindulging Their Children?

    I have seen some cases in which the parents flood their children with gifts and do not spank the young ones when they misbehave badly. These kids sometimes order their parents around and show disrespect. However, I also have seen parents who dote on their younger kids, lavish them with gifts, and find alternative ways to discipline without spanking. These kids seem to behave better. I cannot say whether parents in general are spoiling their kids. My observations are not scientific. However, when it comes to grandparenting, I do feel strongly about one thing. The parents are the boss when it comes to the kids. Grandparents should respect the parental authority and play the supportive role in every way they can without interfering. This means not telling your children how to raise their children unless you are asked for advice. This means only providing discipline to the grandchildren under the approval and the policy of the parents. As for the grandparents’ prerogative to spoil the grandchildren, I do not know about this. I just know I love mine so much it hurts, and I would do anything to be with them. With all that said, as strong as I feel about this, do you have advice for me, or comments?

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  • From Marie Lapierre on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I cannot wait until the writer becomes a grandparent herself. She’s a pompous a** and selfish. I am willing to bet you that HER parents get to see the kids all the time. What does her husband think of all this?

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    • From Pat on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Did you even read the same thing as I did? You’re calling names because a mother is worried about her child dying over a ignorant woman’s desire to feed her child an allergen? Seriously, The “grandparent” generation can be pretty entitled. It’s says that her husband is in agreement. I’m pretty sure that her parents probably get to see the child more because they don’t feed him peanuts.

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    • From Jessica tampe on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      There is no pomp or circumstance to be had when severe allergies are involved. I have 11 grandchildren and always, always, always support their parents rules and expectations for my little darlings. It’s about respect and for a grandma to blame a child for putting himself in harms way is ludacris.

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    • From Emily Taylor on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Selfish in trying to protect her children? I bet you’re a grandparent who has issues with Her DIL. Some women seem to feel a burning need to disrespect and disregard their DIL, and in this case the grandparents are either ignorant or so focussed on showing the DIL that they ‘know best’ they’d rather hurt their grandchildren than concede that the children’s parents are right. Nobody should interfere in a good parent’s decisions, and nobody should put a child at risk just because ‘that’s how they did it in their day’. No parent wants dangerous people in contact with their child and the relationship of those people is irrelevant.

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    • From SadMeeamee on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Usually the husbands are casterated by thier wives. Shame on these sons allowing this. It is evil and is considered Child Abuse. She is making herself look good by saying they have never left their children with a baby sitter. I’m certain she has but it was her parents. She needs to read up on Narccistic personality disorder. Why is she even posting something on a grandparents website. That is shady to me. No one feels sorry for you little girl. Grow up because you are hurting your children in this too not matter what you think. You sound just like my ignorant daughter. The pain ibeing kept from my grandchildren is like someone has died but you have not closure. Stop being an evil b@&tch and let them see your children. Stop being s helicopter mother. I am at the point of a severe breakdown. I was diagnosed with PTSD. I’m on antidepressants, anxiety meds, mood stabilizers. I. Also have ulcers and had a mini stroke. My daughter has hurt me to the core of my spirit. I have thought about just committing suicide because I can’t deal with the pain. The is our only child. We are so confused why she is doing it but apparently your generation think there is nothing wrong with it. Grandparent alienation is an epidemic. You can’t teach your children that loved ones are disposible

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      • From Peterson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        So you are a mother to a daughter that apparently has hurt you so bad your health is at risk. Well, first you have raised her so maybe you have made mistakes while nurturing her and if I would be your daughter (since i don’t want my children to treat me like you described ) I would not let you near them either. Second, what’s the reason your daughter decided to stay distant? Please don’t tell me there is none. If there is none you can’t compare yourself to the above story since there is a LIFE THREATENING reason to stay away from beloved grandma and grandpa. And once you admitted that your daughter has a reason to not please you the way you like well, congratulations it’s your own f****** fault and not her generations way of handling things. What I can hear out of your “seriously out of touch with reality” comment is that you are unhappy with your life and try to blame somebody for it. It’s not your daughters fault, neither your grandchildren and just because the older generations are starting to get unhappy doesn’t mean that ours needs to step-up to serve their needs on the back of our children. PS: please learn how to read because the mother in the story above is clearly scared for her children’s life for obvious reasons and if you need more clarifications about that please print it and take it to your doctor that treats you for PTSD, ulcers and mini strokes- maybe he can explain to you how serious an allergic reaction could end. Cheers to another pill you are popping right now.

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      • From Deanna on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Most people are able to have children and will eventually be grandparents. Not all people are good parents which is why we have child abuse and Children’s Services to deal with that. There are many children who grow up in less than ideal emotional and physical circumstances but it’s not enough for the overwhelmed child welfare services to remove them. Those children grow up, have children and their parents become grandparents. When given the chance to have their own children, they know that they also have a chance to break the cycle. Sometimes the only way to do that is have low to no contact with their own parents who have not changed. In reading your comment, your pain is real, but my guess is that your emotional needs are trumping your daughter’s emotional needs in your mind. I hear an ongoing conflict that you are blaming her for, unable to take responsibility for your own part in it. It’s painful for everyone. I would not be surprised if there’s a lot more to this story.

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      • From Jenn Pitt on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        You have contemplated suicide? That is serious and emotionally unstable. THAT is the reason we don’t leave our daughter with my husband’s mother. That is her last weapon to use when she isn’t getting her way – threatening to kill herself. My husband’s mother, just like you, sound emotionally unstable – so why SHOULD able minded parents leave their fragile children in your care? As parents we need to look out for the best interest of our children – no matter the cost.

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        • From Max Berlin on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

          I have a similar situation – grandmother – my MIL threatens to kill herself if she every hurt our child. But at the same time she won’t recognize the dangers of her husband playing with guns and leaving guns around the house, won’t baby proof, didn’t take the CPR and infant choking training we paid for, has frequent disabling panic attacks, won’t use seatbelts and won’t follow our rules for our child. And she still somehow thinks she should be allowed to see our child and without supervision. Guess what, she hasn’t seen the boy in 6 months and until she starts getting help for herself and getting realistic about dangers and our rights as parents she won’t be seeing him anytime soon.

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      • From TIRED OF RIDICULOUS on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        You have serious Mommy issues. This is the 21st century sweetie. Women have voices and opinions and it seems yours is that now woman is good enough for your little boy?! Buckle up. Sounds as if she has a brain AND self worth to stand up to a insecure bitter old woman.

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      • From TIRED OF RIDICULOUS on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Grandparent alienation only applys to the unstable and unfit

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        • From Melissa Atkinson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

          My daughters ex in laws (father of children is in prison for drugs) are drug dealers and all three of their sons are now in prison for dealing as well. They tried to get her involved too, but she said no and is now living with us because they’re threatening to take the grandkids and go to Mexico. Did I mention none of them are legal citizens of the US? There is nothing the police can do until they actually take the boys si we are living under constant fear that they will come and take them. Grandparents only get rights when they deserve them. These people don’t understand why they can’t see the boys which just goes to show how stupid they are.

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      • From Renee Leblanc on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        I to am a grandparent. I am also diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, depression and I am also taking a mood stabilizer. I don’t see my grandson as much as I would like. I do know it’s not because of me. I know they have a life of their own. The times I do get to see him is priceless. But. To call this mother names is uncalled for. I have another daughter that has a daughter and her son is due any day now and she is a stay at home mother. She does not leave her children with anyone. So yes it is possible that she never has left her children. I grant my children’s wishes when they tell me “Mom I you rather you not give him or her this or that.” And I don’t because I know what it is like I be disrespected as a mother. For you to tell her to grow up sounds like to me she is . Looking after the best interest of her children. I know what it is to have a serious allergen. If you can’t respect your children’s wishes then I feel sorry that they are choosing to not let you see the children. They want what is in the BEST INTREST IN THEIR CHILDREN. They have the right to have them see who they want and when they want. If they can prove to the courts why they don’t want to leave the children or even have the children in the presence of the grandparents then the rights will not be granted. From what I read she has a case. If you want you can look it up under grandparents rights. I have!!!!

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      • From Trinksgirl on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Perhaps you missed the whole “danger” element in her article. I think this womans # one priority was safety of her children and not having them die from a severe anaphylactic reaction. I dont care what peoples relation was to my child if they continued to give them things that could potentially kill them- i wouldnt allow them around my child either. I am not going to knowingly put my child in harms way. if it was a minor issue thats be one thing but continous disregard for severe allergies is just flat out dangerous and it is way within her right and obligation as a mom to be concerned and to protect her kid. Thats the main takeaway of the article not the other stuff. You are missing the big picture and focusing on stupid details she mentioned about not using babysitters and name calling. All she was trying to emphasize was that as a mom she tries her hardest. Maybe u need to re read the article and try to get the point of what she was saying maybe empathize a little, gollee.

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    • From SadMeeamee on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I can understand to about the peanut allergy . I don’t think this is a reason to stop all contact. Communication is very important. Take your children’s own snacks and your husband needs to tal to them and not you. He needs to set boundaries with them. Please do not cut them off I am certain if they feel anything like I do they are in a a bad place. Tomorrow is not guarantee.

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    • From K on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I’m guessing your a grandma not allowed to see your grandkids too funny how you bash this women for protecting her children your selfish and inconsiderate. Grandparent need to know there place in life. As grandparents. Women getting manipulated by in laws is a serious thing and only effects The child’s life. sorry but not sorry. Grandparents no your place. As a mom I do not let my kids around my in laws. They don’t respect me they don’t see my children period.

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      • From Tmull on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        I have just had an insane run in with my inlaws because of a decision we made for our daughter. It almost cost my husband and I a divorce. We reconciled, however, his step mom kept pushing the issue in an attempt of me stating I made the wrong choice by our child. I let it go and finally, after days of it bothering me, how inappropriate it really was…to have her send me and email stating that I needed professional help….umm yeah! She is not allowed contact due to not respecting me. I understand your pain with straight rude and inconsiderate in laws.

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      • From Sandy on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        I had a similar issue with my in-laws. First, parent’s rights are trumped by NO ONE unless the child is being harmed or is in danger. Second, ANYONE that attempts to see if an allergy is “real” by attempting to feed that child the allergen is placing that child in harm’s way. Each exposure to the allergen can elicit a more severe reaction at each exposure. He could have gone into anaphylactic shock. After putting this child in the hospital for 3 days for giving him skim milk or whatever is grounds enough to never allow her near the child again. Yet, she persisted with the peanuts. How selfish can you be???? You will toy with the health and life of a child she supposedly loves? Yeah, that does not go hand in hand in my book. Grandma is a borderline personality and very destructive person and should not be allowed near the kids or this constitutes negligence on the part of the parents. Period. You wouldn’t leave your kid with a pedophile? Well, someone who is willing to put them in the hospital just to prove a point is just as abusive if not more dangerous because the child can DIE. I often struggle with the decision my DH made to cut his family out of the picture but reading stories like this third person confirms that we made the right decision. ANYONE who puts your kids, their lives, health and future at risk for their own personal gain, anyone who refuses to admit when they have made a mistake thereby refusing to acknowledge they have behaved inappropriately will continue to behave the same way, anyone who undermines you as a parent and makes concerted efforts to go against your will in regards to your children have ABSOLUTELY NO PLACE in their lives. Zero. None. There are people who will endanger your child and then play dumb when something bad happened and your child pays the price. It wasn’t her in the hospital for 3 days!! Also, MAJOR red flag: she shows no empathy for the child who ended up in the hospital. “Regardless of the doctor’s reports, to this day she insists she did no harm because it was ok 30 years ago”. A new born ended up in the hospital and you did no wrong?!?! Dangerous. She should be crying tears of regret and pain for her grandson but NO she’s too busy stating she was right. Then guess what? Too late, your child is hurt, traumatized or dead. Since she has only showed disregard and disrespect for not only her grandchild but the parent’s authority as well and intentionally placed the child in harm’s way I’d never go to their house and allow that “my house, my rules” BS my right as a parent overrides her damn house. No way. Mom and dad did the right thing here and should cut them out completely.

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    • From Nina tee on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Marie, Go slap yourself. The grandma gave the baby skim milk at 8 weeks old and let him have peanut butter cookies. Wtf?! The grandma seems koo koo for cocoa puffs! Smh

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    • From Lucy on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      That comment was for Marie LaPierre. I think the writer is doing the right thing for her children. You have to stay strong.

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    • From Theresa on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      You are a ding dong. The grandmother can’t be trusted with the kids as she has clearly tried to entice her grandson to eat something that could KILL him. This is NOT about how bad the grandma feels. This is about keeping her kid alive, which is more important than her mother-in-law’s feelings. Grow up. A woman who really loved her grandkids and wasn’t just trying to make a power play wouldn’t disregard medical advice and go behind the parents’ backs to prove a point.

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    • From Abigail fielding on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Her parents probably respect what she says and not try and kill him with a peanut she knows about I wouldn’t leave them either over my dead body

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    • From Anna Maria on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Nice try, Grandma. Try not jeopardizing your grandchild’s life. Mom is just being a good mom, you are just being selfish.

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    • From Erica W on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      You are probably that grandparent that would do such things to her grandchildren. This “grandmother” is obviously a very sick SICK woman. I don’t blame this woman one bit. She IS protecting HER BABIES which oz what a mother does. Its her call. Not want the grandmother wants. This grandmother has done her time.

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    • From Kelly Smith on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I agree did you even read? That grandmother’s careless actions could cause that child to die. Peanut allergy is nothing to mess around with. The women is ignorant and has no business watching those grandkids unsupervised.

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    • From Tina Wilson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I agree totally with the writer of this article. She gave the grandmother plenty of opportunities to spend time with her grandson even after the first couple of incidents regarding the milk and peanut butter biscults. The grandmother should respect and appreciate this woman’s concerns and affords about the welfare and safety of her child. I have experienced similar problems with my own mother with my own daughter, although not so life threatening which have made not to want to leave my own mother with my 9 year old daughter. My mother rarely pays any interest in my child and she does not visit us at home even though she only lives 20 minutes walking distance away. Once in a blue moon perhaps 3 times a year I will be in desperate need for childcare, perhaps a training conference to attend for work at the other side of town. My daughter normally attends an after school on a normal school and working day. When I ask my mum for help she always replied I don’t really want to do it I am not in mood, do I have to?! When she agrees I am extremely grateful. But when my mum has my daughter at her house she does nothing with her. She doesn’t take her for a walk or any fresh air, my daughter spends her time there sitting in a separate room from my mother in front of the TV. I called once at 8.30pm to wish my daughter good night before she was meant to go to bed… my daughter told me she hadn’t had her dinner yet. I asked my mum what the plan was for dinner and mentioned that she should be sleeping g now… my mother replied she has eaten some crisps and chocolate she can’t be hungry… OK I will make her something to eat when I make my dinner in a couple of hours I am not ready to eat yet, that was at 8.30pm. I always pack activities for my daughter to do in her overnight bag, books to read.. homework from school, my mum doesn’t do it with her. I can’t dare to comment or make a suggestion to my mother to suppirt my daughter with these things because I response I get from my mum is that I am asking too much… and if it’s not good enough don’t ask and I am ungrateful. I try to make a massive effect with my mum… I often call her text her to ask her out for a meal, she replies I don’t like eating in public, I suggest I’ll cook dinner at my house instead… she can’t be bothered. I offer tickets to go and see a movie or show together.. or to go for a Sunday stroll in the local park. She never takes me up on my offer. She doesn’t like to have visitors during Christmas, from the age of 16 I have not spent a xmas day with her am now 39 years old. I put myself through the college and university while holding down 2 jobs to make ends meat, she never supported me or praised me for my efforts. She tells me I travel (my passion with my daughter) too much and no one needs to go away as much as I do. when I do call or text her to ask how she is she rarely answers or returns my calls.

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    • From Amy Fore on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      EXACTLY my thoughts!! Most of the time the husband is caught in the middle. Believe me, I know. I’m a grandparent and in pretty much the same condition right now. Except our state doesn’t have grandparents rights if the parents are still together. My son just keeps saying, give it time, it will get better. She doesn’t want my 4 y/o grandson coming to our house but her parents get him whenever they want and as long as they want. Its just not fair.

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    • From Lilia cast on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Your parenting times were yours. Now it’s their time to raise kids. Not yours. If you understand boundaries you know your role is minimal in the upbringing and you have to respect their house rules. End of line. You’re not.in charge

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    • From Chez on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I loved my in-laws but they are threatening & disrespectful toward me. Respect goes both ways. I still love my in-laws but their behavior has caused emotional harm to me, my child & other family & friends. The grandfather has threatened me twice in the last month and is very controlling. The grandfather also has a child the same age as ours through an affair that he has estranged himself from. He is a bully and has constantly interfered in my marriage. These people ruin it for other wonderful grandparents who do deserve to have contact with their grandchildren, but in this case visitation is no longer an option.

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    • From Michelle Swanston on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I completely and utterly disagree with your comments which quite frankly are tantamount to being aggressive and ill meant. The article I read, although clearly infused with emotion, seemed balanced with acknowledgments of how a relationship should ideally be between a grandparent and a grandchild. Unfortunately, as is clear from this case, a healthy family dynamic is not always achieved and every situation (whether it be access to grandchildren, where to spend Christmas or whatever is important to each family), needs to be managed according to that dynamic. As can be seen from the information in this article, the grandmother is pupurposefuly ignoring or not understanding the requirements of a child with allergies, this in extreme cases can severely hamper the health of the child and therefore the grandmother should be monitored for the safety of that child. Furthermore, we live in a democratic society and for the most part we appreciate the trappings which come along with that, i.e. freedom of choice and freewill, therefore if a parent decides their child should not be placed in the company of certain people, it is quite frankly their choice until said child reaches an age where they can decide for themselves.

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    • From Pam Paul on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I think they have been way too lenient with the grandparents. How many times do you put your children in danger? The grandparents have repeatedly shown a lack of following reasonable accommodations for a child with an allergy. My children would never be at there house again. And I wouldn’t want such selfish callous grandparents to even visit at my house. These are selfish dangerous undermining people.

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    • From Kayla Bender on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      If this so called “grandmother” gave this child peanut butter, she wouldn’t even HAVE a grand child. It sounds to me like you feel equally entitled. You don’t get to decide how to raise someone’s child especially if you have proven yourself both ignorant and irresponsible. Period. I wouldn’t touch that woman with a ten foot pole.

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  • From Peg & Lee Doan on When Parents Divorce

    hi , our daugher suddenly passed away last year , leaving everyone torn to pieces except her husband who didnt shed a tear once . they have two children and we are very very close to them . the father wiped the house clean of our daughter , found a girlfriend and moved her in 4 months after our daughter died and now they plan to get to get married next year .. we have tryed everything to keep peace and see our grandchildren but its not working . the father seems to have a personality disorder and he really needs to go to parenting classes because he is emottionally abusing the children . he let us see them a few times since last year but now its been over a month we havent seen them . he wont let them talk to us or call us and wont tell us how they are . we love them so much and they love and miss us so much and recently , i tryed to go see them and the girlfriend of our grandkids father called the police on me and she lied to the police . I was told by the police she said I pushed my way in and I didnt . The police told me i couldnt go there to the house anymore and the father told the school not to let me come have lunch there with my grand daughter . For the past year we have ask the father to have the children go to counsoling because their mom died and he kept saying he would send them but hasnt . I called children and youth and they said for us to call domesic relations and I did . They said to fill out the application for visitation rights and send $222.00. The application looks complicated . Should we have a lawyer to go through domestic relations ? I know i need to do this quick but Im having trouble coming up with the $222.00 to file … and i dont have any money for a lawyer . My husband is disabled on disablility with several health issues , one is kidney failure and he does kidney dialysis at home and he cant work so he is on a fixed income . is there someone who could help us with this ? also if we go to the conference for visitation rights can we ask the court to insist the kids and the dad get counsoling ? The Father is un emottional , controling and spiteful and he cant see through others eyes and is over stricked with punishments to the kids . he wants my daughters side of the family to disappear like our daughter did . The children think we dont care about them and they have no clue what he is putting us through . we want to see the kids and be there for them and love them and we really dont want to cause any trouble in any ones lives . Thank you for your time , peg

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    • From FGP on When Parents Divorce

      Thanks for writing.
      Sounds like it would be helpful to seek legal aid and assess your grandparent
      s rights in this matter. Call your local chapter of the American Bar Association for guidance.

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  • From Margaret Kroon on Grandparent Jokes

    That reminds me of the time I asked my grandson why my hair was always pink in the pictures he drew of me and he replied “Nana they have your color in the crayon box!”

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  • From Pink Camo Baby Bedding on Rearing Babies Now and Then

    I want to know more about attachment parenting. Can you explain it to me? Pink Camo Baby Bedding

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  • From Michael Rakubu on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    Thank you for the useful information, is there a particular article which you might refer to

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  • From sarah sepesy on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I completely understand. My child has life threatening nut allergies and my inlaws do not take the precautions that I require. It is not to the extent of offering him nuts, though. It is more cross contamination issues. My child has had one anaphylactic reaction and I intend to do EVERYTHING in my power to keep it at only 1 including limiting my inlaws access to him unsupervised. I do not find the writer to be pomous or selfish. In fact, I see the grandparents as pomous and selfish and downright abusive. If the best interest of the child is truly what the grandparents have in mind, they should have no problem adjusting their behavior. Sometimes people are so intent on proving a point, they are willing to hurt people they “love” in the process. That to me proves there really is no “love”. I find it apalling that grandparents who would risk their grandchild’s life as the writer’s do could have any unsupervised access to those precious children. All it takes is one mistake to kill a child with severe allergies.

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  • From Kristina Unhjem on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    This article has helped me so much. Really struggling living abroad. We are in Norway and grandparents are in The Bahamas and in the U.S. I haven’t seen my parents since we moved so Thanks goodness for skype. The care packages sent are very special too for our 5 and 8 year old boys. My father feels I have taken his only grandchildren away from him. Thanks again for this wonderful article. I will share on my blog. Warmly from Norway,Kristina Unhjem http://ournewadventuresourlife.blogspot.no/

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  • From Anonn on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    I miss my grandfather a lot, everytime I think off him or someone mentions him I have to leave the room because I just cry. Even though the last time I saw him was when I was 7 years old and he passed away when I was 13 years old I still couldn’t forget the memories we had.I am now 21 and it still has the same effect on me. He was my best friend, a companion, a guardian and a wonderful grandfather. I pray for him.

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  • From Cathy Smith on Holes in the Family Tapestry

    I am a single woman without children. Even though I never had children, I would like to be a grandparent. I have a lot of time and a lot of love. I need involvment with family. Mine is VERY small at this point and I am looking to be “adopted” by a family. I have found one US website called Surrogate Grandparenting which allows people like me to “advertise” our availability and families looking for grandparents to do the same. But the site is new and there are few people who are using it. There are no families in my state, let alone my area. Do you know of any other sites that would give me more of an opportunity to find a family in need of a grandparent?

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  • From nhbnb x on Grandparents as "Spiritual Guides"

    good ………………………job!!!!!!!!……

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  • From Karen adderton on Getting Along Better By Understanding Individual Differences

    I found these articles very helpful. I am a family therapist and have been asked by my church to develop a program on grandparenting for young parents. After reading these articles, I’m thinking of including children of all ages , parents and grandparents in the program. Do you have any suggestions on how to implement a 3 week program? Thanks, Karen

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  • From Antoinette Smith on Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

    I need help with where to find help for me and my granddaughter. Money is tight and I need to get my granddaughter away from the enviroment that she is in, for her mental well being. My daughter wants to pop in-out of her life when she wants, and this is creating an inbalanced life style. I need help! She thinks this is the teen mom show, what to do?

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  • From Laurene Ann Kaika on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    My granddaughter, Cadence Kaika, was born in November 2012. Christmas eve was the only time I’ve seen her. My son would not allow me to hold her. I am heartbroken. I see pics on Facebook, and hear updates thru my daughter, but am unable to be involved in her life. I am disabled, on SS Disability, and do not drive. The closest cout is in New London, Ct. Please share woth me, the correct steps I must take to be a part of her life.

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    • From FGP on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      Thanks for wirting and sorry for the difficult situation.
      Please check out grandparentsfor children.org to find a support group near you.
      All the best.

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    • From Tami H. on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      Your situation is heartbreaking, but some grandparents make it harder to protect you. I used to be a supporter of grandparent rights. After the death of my husband, my mother-in-law has made everyone here angry when grandparent rights are made into laws. Tabby is an angel that needs our help. Medical and legal costs to protect this special needs child are devastating the family who opened their heart and home to this child when they adopted her. They had no way of knowing the struggles their precious little one faced and would face in the future, and yet they are standing with her and have given everything including their homes, careers and time to be by her side and protect her.

      In 5 days, this angel is facing another hospital stay of 30 to 60 days. At the same time the family is facing yet another court battle to protect her from her biological grandmother, who is suing for custody and determined to let her biological mom have access to her despite the court terminating her parental rights due to physical, emotional and sexual abuse. This “grandmother” has spent the last 6 years stalking the child, tried to kidnap the child, and is under court order to not have contact with this precious child. This family has been dealt a devastating blow with the loss of the husband and father due to military service. The mother has to try and balance the special needs child’s care hospitalizations, daily care, legal battles, harassment by grandmother and try to earn a living at the same time.
      Tami https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/apXL9/ab/63nqV7

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  • From Lyn Stone on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    I find Facetime and Skype to be a wonderful way to communicate. I see my grandaughter talk to her, I even told her a bedtime story while she lay in bed before going to sleep. Her parents are wonderful about reaching out to Grandma and Grandpa and keeping our grandchild connected. Our other children didn’t feel that as much when the grandkids were younger, so the relationship with the grandchildren is more distant now that they’re older. Still, I envy the families that live close to each other and enjoy one anothers company year round.

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    • From Sheryl Johns on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      I am in same situation. I helped my son to get an attorney in CA to make sure our family had contact. I was in my grandsons life daily in CA and now after she remarried and moved my grandson to Fl, across the USA from me, I have been devastated but not without a fight. Not one that my grandson could see or feel. This took place in court. I now talk to him once a week, my son talks to him every other day. I write, send books, skype, send letters, little gifts and pictures. He always has something on the way or arriving in mail almost a few times a week. I take loads of pictures, tell him stories of the pets he loves, even though he’s 7, he enjoys sports and I also keep up on the sporting events in Florida and in CA so I can talk about things that interest him. If you’d like to email me please do. I have found ways to keep us close and I hopefully can be a source of knowledge, support or sounding board for you too. [email protected] anytime you feel like it. I hope your able to get an attorney because it is definitely needed if that’s the way the other parent is feeling about the childs other side of the family. We are not replaceable by a new boyfriend or husband. That’s not going to make us disappear just because her feelings for us has changed. She sounds immature to say the least if not cruel and self seeking in her behavior. I can’t imagine it being worse than I have experienced but obviously it is. My heart breaks for any grandparent or parent who does not have daily contact.

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  • From Frank G Anderson on When Parents Fail

    I’d be interested in seeing some info on existing organizations committed to reintroduction of elders into the family, period, and not just grandparenting although it is the grandparent we are focusing on, and his or her role in society. Any links or advice?A grandparent…

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  • From Martha Jennings on Start a Grandparent Class

    Thank you for the guidelines. Our church is thinking of starting a “Grandparents raising Grandkids” class and your suggestions are a good start. Also, we appreciate knowing about the “Grandparents Guide” which can be ordered from Amazon. Appreciate being put on your e-mail list if you have further info on the subject. Marti Jennings

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  • From Tobi Ledbetter on How To Tell Stories

    I thought this was a great article. I loved telling stories to my daughter and her friends. Some from books but most from my experiences or stories and programs that I remembered from my childhood. She is 20 and every now and then she will ask me about a story that I told her. I look forward to telling stories to my grand children and their friends in the future. I was really surprised to learn that most of her friends parents didn’t tell stories.

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  • From Al Noone on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    I can relate to a comment from Annon but from a different perspective. In my case, I’m the grandfather, I’ve been denied access to my grandchildren for the past two years and am now being taken to court accused of harassment and stalking because I tried to get my daughter to agree to communicate with me after some nasty accusations on her part and, on occasions went to after school Y classes, only to see them arrive by bus and enter the Y, less than a minute or two at best! My motive was to let them know I was around, and cared. I’m 71 and my wife is 65. We both have health problems and I, in particular, am concerned that I may never see them again. The stress has been unbelievable. We think of them all the time, and cry often. And wonder if they will ever truly understand why their grandparents were yanked from them after some 10 years in their collective lives. We were so close, as you might imagine, caring, nurturing, encouraging and praising their successes, even at their young ages of now 11, 7 and 5. We love them so much, but are too poor for legal representation and don’t know where to turn. My oldest grandson and granddaughter and I were inseparable. We believe we are victims of Grandparent Alienation Syndrome perpetrated by our son-in-law and my daughter is under duress, and afraid for both herself and her children. If anyone reading this can help with suggestions, or whatever, please contact me. Al [email protected]

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  • From Janet Roach on Connecting with Grandchildren

    My problem is Our daughter has lost custody of our two granddaughters to their fathers. She was addicted to drugs. We went to three lawyers to ask about getting custody and were told we had no rights and no ground to stand on. The fathers have there flaws as well. the oldest Emma her father drinks allot and he has left several bruises on her and he emotionly abuses her as well. Avah the youngest her father is also an alcoholic/ and abusive to our daughter, he is back with our daughter who has stopped taking drugs but only because she got pregnant now we have a 4 month old grandson Alex. I am in the process of trying to figure out how to go about getting a bill drawn up and passed on the national level for grandparents to have rights. The only qualifications I have to do this is that I am a grandparent. So any help you might be willing to offer would be greatly appreciated. My name is Janet Roach E Mail [email protected] Phone 334-333-6207 Thank you, Janet Roach

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  • From MANJULA SOMA on Grandparents as "Spiritual Guides"

    Dear Sir/Madam, This is Manjula Soma, from India. I need a spiritual guardian very desparately, as I am leading a very miserable life, with my in-laws. Who along with my husband, toture me and my children mentally and physically, they do not allow us to have any personal freedoms, in every things of our day to day lives of us. My childrens talents are just being buried inside them. My children are not being given proper food for their growth, where their health is being spoint, their basic character and conduct is being totally spoilt as we are into the joint family of 30 members. My childrens studies are being desturbed very badly. I do not know what to do. I am not given any freedom to even earn my living, as I am not given any financial support of any kind. As I am educated and done B.A. in English Medium, educated from convent school and under the nuns. I am longing for some friends as I do not have any friends. I am not allowed to make any friends with the people around me. Please be my friend and advice me and guide me through my life. This is my humble request to you.

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    • From FGP on Grandparents as "Spiritual Guides"

      Daer Manjula,
      Your e-mail moved us deeply.
      You will be in our thoughts.

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    • From Allyson on Grandparents as "Spiritual Guides"

      They can do their best to you and your children, but reassure your children that they can never extinguish the fire inside your souls. I tell my children all the time, “the only real thing in this life is imagination”. What you imagine is real. Imagine that you are outside of that torturous circle. Imagine constantly how happy you will be outside off that circle. I tell you by imagining it you will make it true. Spirit will make it happen. Just like the woman said, you are never alone. There is an entire world there to assure you make it though every day learning the lessons you came here to learn and then moving on. Imagination is prayer as well. Remember that by putting it out to spirit, spirit will in turn respond to you. This entire experience is here for YOUR making! Create child!

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  • From hotbloggj6 on Rearing Babies Now and Then

    5…

    This article is really great, people do not be conscious of the author’s writing situations. I want to present it to more people, so the more the body will be such a okay feeling….

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  • From ritika sehrawat on When Parents Fail

    WE SHOULD ALWAYS CARE FOR OUR GRANDPARENTS ,THEY LOVE GRANDCHILDREN MORE THAN THEIR CHILDS.WE SHOULD FEEL VERY LUCKY TO HAVE BOTH OR ONE GRANDPARENTS ,THINK OF THOSE WHO HAVEN’T HAVE THEIR GRANDPARENTS EVEN THEY HAVEN’T SEEN ONCE A TIME THEIR GRANDPARENTS FROM THEY SHOULD GET THE LOTS OF LOVE AND CARE THAT OUR GRANDPARENTS GIVE US AND WE CAN HAVE. THIS IS MY REQUEST TO THOSE WHO ARE READING THIS PLEASE CARE FOR YOUR GRANDPARENT OR SENIOR CITIZENS BECAUSE THEY CAN’T COME IN OUR LIFE AGAIN & AGAIN.

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  • From Franni Harkness on Grandparent Jokes

    During the holidays last year, My youngest Granddaughter and I would drive past the Nativity display in our town on the way to and from Pre -K. She wanted to know all about the baby sleeping in the manger and the figures surrounding the baby, Mary, Joseph and The Three Wise Men. During the remaining part of the year she would often refer to Baby Jesus. Last week while waiting for the school bus she asked, ” Grammie, remember when you used to drive me to Pre-K.?” “Yes, I remember.” I replied. ” and remember when we used to see Baby Jesus sleeping in the manger?” “Yes, I remember.” I answered. Then she asked me, “Well, how OLD is he now?”

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  • From Kathy White on Grandfamilies State Law & Policy Resource Center

    I want to know my rights as a grandparent. My daughter threatens that I will never be able to see my grandson if I kick her out of my house for disruptive behavior. I am so heartbroken for my 2 month old grandson.

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  • From Karen Benson on Start a Grandparent Class

    I am starting a group here in my area. This was very informative and what I was looking for. Thank you.

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  • From Sheila M on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    There is also support and advocacy groups around the US called Alienated Grandparents Anonymous, the main website is www.aga-fl.org, go there to find a support group in your area. The founder, Amanda monitors the website regularly and will get back with you immediately. For those in Kentucky, please contact [email protected] Good luck to all those grandparents out there that only want the best for their grandchildren! On Facebook go to https://www.facebook.com/AlienatedGrandparentsAnonymousKentucky

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  • From ernesto luiz mendez on Characteristics of Effective Grandparents

    i never met my grandparents (who lived in puerto rico)—but i did know one of my mother’s sisters and brothers. i’m 57 years old and fondly remember their exuberance and loving care. more so than i remember my own mother’s. I especially hold dear the times tio (uncle) Gabriel he would visit…bringing gifts, too (for a hand full land brothers and sisters)—but was distinctyly memorable was his rubbing his stubbled cheek and shin against my face.

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  • From Eddie on Helping With Your Grandchild's College Tuition

    I want to share GradSave with everyone, we are a Free College Savings Registry, grandparents give your grandkids the gift of a college education. A GradSave gift card is a thoughtful and lasting gift, send one to your grandchild’s parents so they can start a profile and receive gifts that will go directly to their 529 college savings plan. Check us out at www.gradsave.com

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  • From Ronald Wood on Grandparent Research

    I am a grandparent with a court ordered visitation in California. My ex wife ” who is the grandmother of the child” and her husband have guardianship of the child and are planning to adopt my grandchild. Will my court ordered visitation stay in effect after the adoption?

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  • From Krista J Bailey on When Parents Fail

    Here is a question I am a Grandmother that has been put in the position to rise my granddaughter. I have had Taby since her birth. Taby is now 6 years old and in first grade. I have papers from the state that state that the mother is a noncustold parent and a certified paper with the mother stating that granddaugter lives with me. Less than a week ago came to visit Taby and now has refused to bring her back. I fill like Taby was kidnapped. what rights do i have? if any.

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    • From FGP on When Parents Fail

      Call your local American Bar association for the name of a lawyer to talk with.
      Also log on to www,grandparentsforchildren.org. for the names of a grandparent support group near you.

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  • From lisa Grantham on Grandmother's Song

    I never knew there were resources to help grandparents deal with issue. I was raised by my grandparents and now I’m raising my 2 of my grandchildren. I definitely have a greater sense of respect fir my grandmother and I appreciate her alot more. Thanks for some understanding and guidiance on this issue that is so swept under the rug.

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  • From Joe Burch on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Kayte an I have a son an daugter in law that have gone back to meth.They had been away from it for around six years.Son was preaching an his wive an him where taking the church children out for church nights.They where really involvet with church an there three children,the first one eleven,we had him the first five yrs..then they had a girl four yrs.and now ten mo.old boy.They have desirted them for about mo an ahalf.Kayte works at a Hospital I,m 63 an desabled.But Kayte an I are fighters,an seeing the children cry an sop,has given new strenght an indurance.I,m on alot off meds our medical has cost us alot.awer banking is behind our home is cossy for the kids an we have brighten up there live,s,more smiles an laghter. But we where looking to do some repares on the home. Well we havent seen the mom for about two mo.her sister trying to talk her into seeing a docter to save her live.Our son has gotten so violent verable an physically,we want to get an attorny but don,t know about the cost.I,ll keep looking around for more info.If any one has more info for use we would really like it well if anything they are really great kids.

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    • From Emi love on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Ugh I’m so sorry you and your family are going through this. Is your wife disabled? Are you living with her? The grandchildren you said are with you all because their parents have abandied them there correct? This is such a hard case. Because of your disability and because you’re financially in the hole, the children may end up in child services. I know what you’re going through. My cousin and the mother of his children had their babies taken away because they didn’t have jibs and always left the kids to get high. It’s tough. Right now their 3 year old son is with the grandmother (a known heroine addict) and their 1 year old daughter is in the system. We don’t know where she is. I wish I could help you. I’m so sorry. Do they have aunt or uncles who live near willing to take them in?

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  • From Cheryl Forbes on Editorial: Mistakes Grandparents Make

    How supportive can you be when a newly pregnant daughter in law wants her privacy and does not want to be asked questions. This gal suffers from a mother who abandoned her.

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  • From James Hemwall on Tips for Better Grandparenting

    I am a horrible grandparent and need advice.

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  • From Marian Hofmann on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    Can you advise how I (the paternal grandmother) can connect with my 4 yo grandson who soon will be off to the other side of the country (3,000 miles away….) when the child’s mother has decided that he doesn’t necessarily need contact with his fathers family….( My son and her are no longer together and she will be moving in with a new man and his son….) From the beginning I have been in my grandson’s life and I am so afraid that he will feel abandoned by me……..Do I have any legal recourse,I live in New Jersey and they are moving to California….Can she be court ordered to let me speak with him a few times a month at least on Skype????

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    • From FGP on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      Please see the articles on Grandparents Rights and especially log on to grandparentsforchildrensrights.org.
      You will need legal help.
      All the best.

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    • From Sheryl Johns on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      My contact had to be during my sons time. So if he has 30mins 4 times a week via phone and skype, I had to fit into that time. It was so mom didn’t have to make arrangements with two people. I have NO rights as a grandparent in CA. Thank God my son was able to get every holiday and time off school with him, and almost daily phone and skype contact, as well as all summer. I hope your child is able to get help through courts in NJ even if the mother is compliant with him, still get it on a court order. Never know how somebody is going to act or react to situations that will indirectly effect our grandchildren. I document everything also. Every call, letter email, visit and have done that since he was born. Helped in court.

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  • From Linda on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Very sorry to hear about your situation and I think you need to do the right thing and protect your children and not leave them with dangerous grandparents unsupervised. I wish my kids can have good relationship with their grandparents. But in the past 4 years my mother in law seem to come up with new ways that would potentially hurt my kids. She doesn’t do it intentionally. I think she is just not capable to think about health and safety for kids. When my daughter was 7 months old she just started to sit on her own. I can see from daycare camera that my mother in law would pull my 7 month baby by the wrist 2′-2.5′ across the floor so that the baby can be closer to her. When my baby was 9 months old and started to stand up, again, I saw from daycare camera that the grand father was holding her wrist to help her stand…but then seconds later, to my SHOCK, my mother in law bend down and lift up my 9 months old baby by the ankle and started swinging her in the air by her wrist and ankle. The day care teacher had thought there was 2 adult so that they left the room only for 3 minutes. She scheduled to have a face lift done on the due date of my second baby. She had scared my 2 year old daughter so much with her bruised face that my daughter was scared of her for an entire year. She is only not scared of her after 4 months of my telling her we love everyone in our family. She would show up to eat with us when she has cold sore or when she is sick….making my kids sick and me sick. Even just last week, she would hold my 2 yr old son’s hand making his arm in a awkward position just so she can feel happy she had hold his hand. How can I trust this person even if she is my husband’s mother to spent time along unsupervised with my 2yr old and 4 year old. I fear i may have to pick them up in emergency room.

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  • From charles zetka on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    .. i love you too grndfatherMy grandfather Philip Strimel died from pancreatic cancer in 1958 when i was only 3 months old he was 63 i am now 55 and last year came across a picture of him in his police uniform in 1935 on a harley with a sidecar very striking i love this photo from the historical society in monessen pa. so i had it blown up and i framed it well two days later i went into my local goodwill store and there was this model of a 1935 harley with a sidecar exactly the same as his and a very rare item its actually a telemania novelty phone1935 harley with sidecar very rare as ive searched all over ebay and the net for another! but they are very rare! how did this item come to me? im very cinvinced it was sent to show that he is still around meas he died when i was only 3 months old i love you too grandfather and i believe we will meet again thanks to god for letting me know! every day now i am flabbergasted! by the way if you look on ebay under police sidecar photo you will see my grandfather philip strimelhe is on the far right as there are 4 police bikes in the picture and this photo is very popular on the internetp.s. this is a true story thanks to all wholisten

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  • From Eva DeLorge on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    when was this enacted ? and also I don’t see how it is different. You still have to be in a parent like relationship with the child to get visitation. Most grandparents aren’t So how does this help ? and as far as support groups they can talk to one another but that’s not going to get you to see your grandchildren and take away the heartache. Grandparents should be able to visit their grandchildren as long as they are fit. Adult children use this law out of spite . Grandparents add so much to a child’s life and the grandchildren should not be punished for any differences the parents and grandparents have

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  • From Terry Newell on Characteristics of Effective Grandparents

    This was the best, most rewarding read I’ve had in a good while. My husband and I began raising a grand daughter when she was 8 months old, – she’s a 10-1/2 year old “tween” now – and we have enjoyed every moment. I think we must have worked out all the kinks in the process while parenting our 6 kids, so that grandparenting seems almost effortless. As I grow older, I’ve wanted to write about some of what life has taught me, or about some of the things hindsight has shown me. Maybe my kids will read something I’ve written some day and learn from my experience, they certainly aren’t going to listen if I try to tell them, right? Anyway, everything I’ve been struggling to write about, to put into words, I’ve just read, right here on this site. Thank you so much. Terry Newell

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  • From Alice Jungclaus on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    What a great article with useful tips – especially in the “guideline” section. Maintaining a positive child-grandparent connection is such a gift for any child. Especially when global mobility and long-distances are part of the family context. I recently had an inspiring and wise grandparent featured on my website which can be found here: http://globalwiseparenting.com/2014/06/happy-living-insights-from-a-grandparent/

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  • From Kristen Hernandez on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Thinking about both sides of the story here, I would venture to guess that the grandparents think the parents are being hysterical and ridiculous with their insistence that their son be treated with “kid gloves.” SO MUCH is left out of the story here that I cannot pass judgment on anyone. “Middle aged” does not mean “well educated” and a lot also depends on the time/era/culture in which these adults grew up. (not liking that I can’t do a hard return here by the way). The grandparents are being completely unreasonable, however, in insisting on unsupervised visitation – obviously someone needs to be there to ensure that the child is not poisoned while in company of his grandparents, because they have shown blatant disregard for the doctor’s orders. My own story: I have two children with ADD/ADHD and my parents spent their entire childhood fighting me on whether I should get them evaluated or medicated. I was stopped at every turn and accused of trying to “drug” my children into “submission.” That was never the case; I was admittedly being driven insane by their behaviors, their opposition & defiance, and their risk-taking activities. Nonetheless, once my children got old enough to understand the issues, they themselves started coming home from my parents’ house telling me I was wrong to want to “drug” them and that they did not want me to put “mind altering chemicals” into their bodies. Like I was trying to inject them with Heroin or something equally horrific! Finally, when my youngest was 16, she decided on her own to go seek help and find out if medication would help her. This was after she (who is incredibly intelligent) failed a grade in high school from excessive absences and incomplete assignments. The medication has completely turned her around and she is now a rising senior at University, getting mostly A’s and very infrequent B’s in her classes. She finally understands that the medication was not to CHANGE her personality but to free her from the misery of her disease. I tell this story because I want you to know that grandparents do NOT always know what is best for their grandchildren and they often misinterpret a competent parent’s attempts to ensure his or her child’s health, safety, mental health – with “hysteria,” “paranoia,” “craziness,” etc. Just because the things we deal with in this generation are different from those our parents dealt with when we were growing up, doesn’t make them any less real. Maybe you could bring some literature from the doctor’s office to the grandparent’s house and CALMLY discuss with them what the reactions could be. Maybe you could talk to them about how pesticides, hybridization and GMO foods have altered our foods so much that they are not the same kinds of foods we used to eat as children, and that allergies to peanuts are far more common today than ever before. We don’t know what causes them, only that they can be highly dangerous. Take them to the doctor for an appointment and have the doctor explain it to them. Anything. But stop acting like a hysterical, over-protective, crazy lady who would keep her child from his grandparents just because you’re too insecure to face them and talk to them like an adult. You are the parent and you set the limits. Period. But don’t be stupid. Your kids need their grandparents and you need to calm down a little.

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    • From Roberta carson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Hysterical, over protective, crazy lady….those words pass judgement don’t they??? If the grandparents will disregard the doctors orders and their concerns when they’re at the house. Then what are the parents suppose to expect if they’re not there….she had already talked to them and nothing has changed so….. She should continue to reason with them why??? Before it gets said I’m a mother of 10 and grandma of 13. I know it can get precarious at times,but putting children in harms way just because you don’t believe or don’t think the illness is present is foolish. The key with dil’s and sil’s and our adult children is respect for them and support for their expectations for the kids and their medical conditions. Life’s to short and Wow! The kids grow so fast. No one wants to miss that 🙂

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    • From Katie stokes on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I would just like to say simply that no matter what a grandparent wants/says it is absolutely always the parents who have the last say. Children are born of a mother and a father not a mother and father and four older people. Grand parents who don’t know their place really get on my nerves. If they care about their own children’s happiness they will not place their own selfish demands on them and ruin their relationships/marriages as a consequence of trying to dictate the lives of other people’s children

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  • From Judith Krohn on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    All these suggestions for staying in touch are very helpful, and I have done most of them. However, the worst barrier to ‘being together for important family events’, and just ordinary visiting, is the lack of finances!! from both sides – inability to afford huge air fares for inter-continental travel means regular visits become impossible. There is no solution to this part of the ‘missing grandparents’ problem, despite all the technological supports we have. Most friends and neighbours in our large retirement complex have children close by, or travel often to visit (no lack of funds) – we just have to smile for them when we hear all the shared fun they have. It’s sad for those of us who don’t have that joyful closeness.

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  • From Catty Johnsteele-Martin on Smile: Grandparent Jokes

    i just luv these, simple & cute ….like children. Thanks for sharing smiles

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  • From Gerri Rhoads on Becoming Close to Stepgrandchildren

    I have two recent step grandchildren, aged 9 and 11. Recently, at a family dinner, I saw my grandson, aged 9, stop at a small table which held photos of my 7 grandkids. He sighed, and said, “Not yet.” I suddenly realized he was looking for his picture on that table. He was very pleased when, at his next visit, he and his sister were represented along with the other grandkids on my table. I’m so grateful I heard his desire for inclusion in his new extended family.

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  • From Tina Tudor on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    WHERE CAN I GO AS A GRANDPARENT TO GET LEGAL HELP ON CLAIMING A GRANDCHILD ON INCOME TAXES?

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  • From Nancy Savory on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    Thank you for the wonderful tips. My husband retired a year ago and we are seriously contemplating moving 71/2 hr from our children and grandchildren. We have lived close all of their lives and they love coming to stay with Oma and Papa. And we love having them here. Weekly. We have 5 between the ages of 8-12. Some are excited to be able to visit us in a new place and some really don’t want us leaving. We are happy being close but not happy at all with the area. We will be moving to an area where there will be lots to do with them when they visit. (There is NOTHING here. Literally.) We are excited about moving but I keep wondering if we will regret not being close to them any more. Our children are very supportive of us and are also excited about having a nice place to come visit. My husband says I will be able to come here and my daughter plans to come see us often. I plan to use these suggestions to the fullest, so again, thank you.

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    • From FGP on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      Thanks for sharing
      Very complicated.
      Depends what you are you moving TO?

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    • From Terry Oxford on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      If there is no financial pressure to move, I advise you to stay put. My husband & I left California and high cost of living to move to Nevada. We are 8 hours away from our 10, 12, and 13 year old granddaughters. Two of the girls don’t like to talk on the phone or email or write. We visit about every 6 weeks but have to stay in hotels. I regret the move every minute of every day! Their lives get busy and it is hard to schedule visits.

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  • From Katherine Mack on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    My daughter and her son live with me. I support both of them and pay for child care so she can work. (She does pay for a portion of it). Am I able to file for child support from the father? I live in NC?

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  • From MP on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    I can really relate to this. I lost my grandpa a little more than 6 months ago. I miss him so much. I was very close to him because he was more like a father figure to me than my real father. I always cry every time I think about him. I was with him everyday during his short hospitalization, sometimes even sleeping in his ICU room. He passed away a month before I started my last year of nursing school. During one of my clinical rotations in the hospital, I was reminded of my grandpa as one of my classmate’s patients had a very similar reason for hospitalization and I just broke down and started crying. How I wish that I can even spend one more week, day or hour with him and tell him how much I appreciate him for being there my whole life. I wish he could see me graduating college this May because he always promised me that he was going to be at my graduation. But I know he’ll be able to see me from above. I miss you..

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  • From Sel on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    You are so lucky to see him when you were 13 years old but my grandfathet left us when i was 6 or 7 yeard old . I Can’t remember anything about him ( his voice …) and the most sad thing that I forgot all the beautiful time that we had together ! I’m so upset

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  • From jeff bulman on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I agree that not all grandparents should have the right to see there grandchild .I myself am dealing with my own parents who failed to keep an eye on my 11/2 year old daughter and she drowned because of there neglect to watch her they feel that I shouldn’t be upset that it was an accident how can it be called an accident when you fail to watch the child I call it neglect what’s so hard to understand that if they did what they were suppose to then she wouldn’t have drowned

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    • From Randi Dakin on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Jeff, I wanted to offer my condolences on the tragic loss of your daughter. What a heartbreaking event. The fact that she was in your parents’ care at the time only adds to the heartbreak. Ordinarily, when a parent faces such a devastating loss, they would turn to their family members for support and solace; I imagine that the current circumstances render that very challenging at this time. I can only imagine that they must also be grieving and feeling a very heavy burden as well. The grief and guilt of everyone involved must make any estrangement all the more painful. I don’t think there is any easy way forward out of this emotional morass but I hope that with time, you all might find some healing out of this tragedy and loss.

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    • From Jessica on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. Your feelings are justified, and I would feel the exact same way. I agree that this was not an accident; it could have easily been prevented so it was child neglect.

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    • From Eleni on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I’m so sorry Jeff for ur loss!! I am reading everyone’s stories and it’s almost 4am and I’m crying to see all that pain in your lives. I will keep u and everyone in my thoughts and prayers.

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    • From Amy Fore on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Children need their grandparents. Both sets of grandparents! Like in our case, there is nothing wrong with me and my husband. We have never once done anything to hurt those children (our 4 y/o bio grandson and 11 y/o step grandson). We love them with ALL of our heart! There is nothing we wouldn’t do for them. or for our son and DIL, which we have. BUT nothing is ever good enough for this girl. She trusts her family but doesn’t her husbands family. We raised him and she married him? Hello?! We did a darned good job at raising him too because he supporting her behind.

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  • From Adrienne Flowers on New Kid On The Block

    What are your ideas about grandparents and their response to challenging behavior of grandchildren.

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    • From FGP on New Kid On The Block

      Great Question.
      Would like readers to reply
      Gotta remember that grandchildren aren’t children, and the more grandparents take on the “police” function, the more the
      intergenerational magic is adversely affected.
      All the best.

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  • From Randi Dakin on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    A few things came to mind when I read this post. The first is that this is a mom whose concerns about a potentially life-threatening allergy in her child haven’t been respected; this seems to have been what has fueled the estrangement. The second is that these are grandparents who seem to be frightened about losing a cherished bond with a grandchild; this seems to have fueled their decision to take legal action. There is no update so we can’t know how these three generations resolved the conflict between them but for other families who might find themselves in a similar circumstance, perhaps mediation rather than court action would help to repair the generational bonds. Perhaps too, the parents would have felt more comfortable with the grandparents visiting the kids in the parents’ home, as opposed to having them visit or stay over in the grandparents’ home. That said, I am certainly in favour of grandparents having the right to at least petition the court to maintain and preserve a relationship with a grandchild. If the relationship is such that it will truly be a detriment to the child to have it continue, their parents can present that evidence. I do not say this in favour of pitting parents against grandparents, but rather, in keeping with the accord of “the child’s best interests”. A child is born into a family and, for better or worse, that family is a child’s birthright.

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  • From Kerry Thurlow on Smile: Grandparent Jokes

    While putting my six year old grandson in the shower because it was the next day was school photo day. He asked, “Gigi, are the picture people gonna see my whole body?” I replied, “No, they are just going to take a picture of your face.” A minute or so passes and he asks, “If they are only taking a picture of my face why do I need to wash my WHOLE body?”

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  • From Richard Johnson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    The main problem is Grandparents feel they have some right to be in the child’s life, as if since they raise you all of the sudden they have authority over your offspring, this is false and Grandparents need to start waking up to this fact. A child does not need you in their life. It’s an extra not a need. And you must follow the rules set by the actual parents or be shut out,

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  • From James Martin on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I have noticed that in the majority of cases the mother prefers that the child love her parents and family rather than the father’s parents. A bit of candy will not kill your child. Extravagant gifts will not harm your child. In-laws who love your child can not possibly be a bad thing. At some point your child will be old enough to understand the difference in rules at home and rules at grandma’s and grandpa’s house. Teach your child to appreciate the love that the grandparents have for him or her. Learn to appreciate it yourself. Don’t insist on your husband choosing sides, nobody wins. His parents obviously had good parenting skills to raise a kind and caring man with whom you fell in love.

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    • From Emily Taylor on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      But it wasn’t a bit of candy, was it? It was repeatedly giving peanuts to a child with a severe nut allergy because the grandparents seem to think they know best, better than even the child’s medical team. As for giving a baby skimmed milk, it’s a pity they were t prosecuted for that. It wasnt a mistake, it was a wilful disregard of the parents. That baby had appropriate formula milk there, but grandma again thinks she knows best and butts right in and endangers the child. She’s either poorly educated or is purposely trying to override her daughter-in-law. She sounds like she has issues. I wouldn’t be surprised if the court action is another attempt to win and defeat the DIL. After all, they can’t truly love their grandchildren if they act so negligently towards them. These ‘grandparent orders’ are for loving, competent grandparents who have been wrongly excluded from their grandchildren’s life (usually after the divorce of the parents). They’re not for negligent grandparents who insist they have a right to put children at risk because they have a blood tie to them. If I was the OP I’d be looking to get an Order banning them from having contact with the children after such disgraceful behaviour. And yes, hopefully I’ll be a grandparent one day but I’d never disregard the parents wishes and I’d never put my grandchildren at risk. That’s a grandparent’s job – to protect the grandchildren and respect their parents’ decisions. Why should any parent have to leave their children in a potentially dangerous situation?

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      • From Maddyf on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Totally agree with you! This comment sums it up so well.

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      • From Louise edwards on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        I need to write on here , I’m a person of 51 now , came from a broken family , and was stopped seeing my dads parents , who I loved so much , it’s not always about the parents , it’s about the child , stay with the children , but don’t do this , it breaks families up , and it always bites you years later , I’ve learnt the hard way my mother and I don’t speak now , and I don’t see my grandchildren now , due to family fall outs , when your grandson puts his coat and shoes on at 3 , and wants to stay at Nan’s for a little bit of time and is told no , it’s heart breaking , I know older people can be difficult , it’s the time there were born in

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    • From Miss eliza on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I get this completely. Me and my partner favour my mum and dad over his. But that’s because my parents do and would do without a doubt everything his parents wouldn’t. Of course a woman is going to be closer to her mum. Ask her mum for advice. A mother in law will often favour her daughter over sons. It’s just how it is. I know from personal experience my daughter doesn’t exist to my partners dad vecause his partner has clawed her teeth in and only cares for her grandkids and wants him yo do the same.our relationship with them have been terrible because of mil. I wouldnt even go to them if i was homeless…I wouldn’t leave my daughter alone with them. They’ve snickers and pointed and laughed at my daughter. I wouldbt want her brainwashed or picked on or left out. My partners real mother. My daughter doesn’t know exists. She’s horrible and vile and abusive. I couldn’t risk leaving my daughter with her in case of a beating.sometimes grandparents need to realize they need to earn the position. My in laws haven’t bothered with my daughter. My partner is furious. But if they tried to get legal action they’d be messing with the wrong mumma bear. As for having rights they have no rights. They aren’t their babies. My girl only knows she has two grandparents because they are the only ones that bother with her.

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  • From Joseph Miller on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I think it’s great when grandparents are as equally involved as parents. There are so many kids and even adults who didn’t share a close bond with their grandparents– some barely knew theirs. I think it’s awesome if a child is equally as close to their grandparents as they are to their own parents. I would be really happy if my children was as close to my parents as I am to them–I’m actually almost afraid that won’t happen. http://cabreralawoffices.com/

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  • From Joseph Miller on A Grandchild's View of Divorce

    Providing support at a difficult time can bring the family closer, but it’s not always possible. Support can be a listening ear or more practical day-to-day help, such as cooking meals and caring for your grandchild. Time with grandparents can be a relief for grandchildren who may be caught in the middle of two parents. Your home should be a neutral zone. Keep the focus on your growing relationship with your grandchildren, not their parents disintegrating one. http://cabreralawoffices.com/

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  • From Joseph Miller on Editorial: What Parents Can Do

    Very nice and useful information. I really like it. Thanks for sharing! http://cabreralawoffices.com/

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  • From Adam Doe on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I don’t know how accurate your story is but grandchildren should never be kept from grandparents unless there is a threat they will die or be sexually abused. If there is a concern they are not safe with the grandparent then the parent can come and supervise. But, if the kids are withheld for any reason other then risk they may die or be sexually abused then it otherwise is the parent who is at fault and not the grandparent. Children need four grandparents if the grandparents are living. In the case of the food allergies I can see that being concerning but if you are there supervising then it will not be a problem regardless of what adult on adult problems the parent and grandparent have with each other. The only exception is if, with you there also, there is still a risk the kid may die or be sexually abused, and that is highly rare.

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    • From Charlotte on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Adam, grandparents are not entitled to be in their grandchildren lives, they do not and should not have any rights regarding their grandchildren. they should not be allowed to file for visitation rights (either unsupervised or supervised) because, while there a some bad parents in the world, the parent may have had past experiences with the grandparents and the parents do not want them around their children, it’s their choice who gets to e around their children. I found your comments to be uneducated and that you felt like grandparents are ENTITLED to have a relationship with their grandchildren. The grandmother in the story, had obviously shown no respect for the health and safety of the child and was just a spiteful old hag. The grandparent generation think that they can boss everyone around because they are older. If these grandparents won visitation rights, the child would be in serious danger, as the mother has said that the child allergies are life threatening

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    • From Maddyf on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Completely ridiculous and I would consider moving countries away from my parents if they completed disregarding doctors orders that kept my child from experiencing potentially deadly allergic reactions and still felt entitled to visitation rights. I did not know one side of my grandparents well whatsoever and we now live on the other side of the world from them and i do mot doubt my parents decision at all, my grandparents are stubborn and strict with children and very judgemental and i did not enjoy their company nor did my parents enjoy the way they treated me. It was in no way dangerous or sexually abusive but makes entirely no difference.

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    • From TIRED OF RIDICULOUS on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      WOW. You may be as completely insane as the In-Law. PARENTS, Good Patents, are THE ONLY two people “entitled” to decide who their children spend time with! Only sensitive narcissists would side with the “Sad” one and other selfish insecure brats.

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    • From Erin on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      To SadMeeame, wow you are a piece of work. You sound exactly like my abusive parents and it’s sickening that call your own daughter a [email protected] What does that say about you then? And secondly, your phychological and health problems are your problems and not your daughter’s fault. This mother who wrote this blog only has her kids best interests at heart. You sound like an entitled bleep and I suggest instead of finding fault with your daughter and criticizing her, and be loving and supportive. Grandkids aren’t stupid, and they certainly won’t like you calling their mother a [email protected] Kids will always defend a good mom, and distance themselves from a nasty, bitter grandmother. You sound like the one with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, not your daughter. Grandparents and other people should never be given a broad right to continue the cycle of abuse with their childrens children. You sound like a textbook example of intergenerational domestic violence.

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  • From Stephanie Callaway on The Grandparent Drive

    My son passed away when my grandson was only 5 yrs old. My grandson is now 9. My son and the mother lived around the corner from us until 2 mos ago. They recently moved an hour away. That being said, I was a regular part of my grandson (Jacob) life. I picked him up from school twice a week and I helped regularly with watching him while the mother worked. The mother started dating someone that I wasn’t sure was a positive in their life and had actually asked her questions about him. As soon as that came up she immediately cut me off and now I can’t see him. She and jacob have since moved in with her mother who has also added to the difficulty in seeing my grandson. She tells me to stay out of the mothers life..that’s gine, I just want to make sure my grandson is in a safe situation and that I am able to have a relationship with him and visit him. I will make the drive and go around her schedule, but at this point I can’t get her or my grandson to return my phone calls. I have been ALLOWED to see him 4 hours in the last 4 months. It’s been horrible. My son, God rest his soul, would be so upset to know what was going on. He has had isdues at school that arr concerning, she also took him out of school 6 weeks before it ended and enrolled him in a new school that late in the game. My daughter, Jacob’s aunt, has offered financial help, acedemic assistance, and has offered to pay for a private education, in order to help with his learning challenges and all of the offers have been ignored or denied by the mother, and without warrant. The mother did have a child services case about three years ago for being in an auto accident while under the influence, my grandson suffered injury. Her mother had to live with her (and was considered to have custody of him) until child services decided she had been to the required classes and was deemed fit. So her record is less than desirable. All I want is to see my grandson. I am not asking for custody or trying to make things harder on Jacob I simply love him and want to be a part of his life regularly..

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  • From Wendy Velazquez-Blas on The Grandparent Visitation Law

    My husband and I have been refused vitiation with our five month old grand daughter by our son and his girlfriend. The girlfriend committed felony vandalism to someone’s car while on our property and authorities were called. They are refusing the child because we had to give statements to the police. The girlfriend and mother of the child has a history of being unstable and violence. She has not yet faced the charges against her with regards to the vandalism but that is immanent. While our son is a good father to the child he is siding with her in refusing the baby to see us. The mother who is 19 has a 4 year old daughter who lives with her mother and they also assist with childcare of the infant. We are considering suing for visitation rights as we’ve tried to reach out to them and they are not even looking to work things through and continue to refuse us to see the baby. We live in Naples FL and from what I understand the odds are not in our favor. Can you recommend a qualified office we can call for counsel? Any help or advice you can offer is greatly appreciated.

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    • From FGP on The Grandparent Visitation Law

      PLease check out GRAND magazine. They have contacts for Grandparent Visitation issues.
      All the best.

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    • From Marilyn Roy on The Grandparent Visitation Law

      My husband and I have a very similar problem, except the mother is our daughter and she and her boyfriend, father of our 4 yr old grandson is refusing us to ever see him again after bonding with him since birth. We are very close despite living 9 hours away. Me & my husband live in south Florida and they in Alabama, however we have made regular visits, averaging every 2 months since our grandson’s birth. We were even considering moving there but changed our minds with so much friction in our relationship with our daughter & her BF. While visiting last month they both became angry with us for disagreeing with them showing our G-son adult TV programs. There are other unhealthy things he is exposed to, but no visual abuse to the publics eyes. We are broken and we know this has affected him as well. We want to get visitation but no money to pursue.

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  • From jUDY sHEMNITZ on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    Living eight hours away from my only grandchild is extremely stressful, sad and depressing. The one thing that truly makes me happy is something I cannot have: constant contact with my beautiful granddaughter. My daughter and son in law have no intentions of ever coming back to live near me. I have been dealing with this since she moved seven years ago. skyping,phone calls are only superficial ways to keep in contact. Holding a baby is what I crave. I travel as much as possible but plane fares are expensive and driving that long is a drag. What to do?

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    • From Heather Clarke on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      Get therapy. Making another person responsible entirely for your happiness is not fair to that person, child adult or baby. especially a baby. Don’t expect your daughter to drop everything (job, community ties, school, etc) and move to inconvenience her but please you. If it is such a “big deal”, why don’t you drop everything and move?

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      • From Sheryl Johns on Long-Distance Grandparenting

        I believe you may be on the wrong site, have never had a grandchild, or your not understanding the question the woman wrote. Your attidude was very dismissive to a person who is dealing with the loss of family. The reasons a family may be apart vary from divorce, employment, financial, and sometimes due to family disagreements. It is not for another to judge why a family is aprt and the site is for grandparents to find support in dealing with the absence of their grandchildren and often that includes their children. I find your remark callous and rude. The grandparent did nothing wrong by stating she is having a difficult time being away from her grandchildren and does not see her children ever moving, therefore she was asking what can she do? Your response was uncalled for and therefore has me believing it is you that may need “therapy”. She came to the correct place and the response form you was cold callous and wrong, not her.

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  • From Karen Kerkhove on Characteristics of Effective Grandparents

    I have Grandchildren who live in another state. I visit often but like to have more “face time”. I regularly read to them via the FaceTime app on my IPad. I face the camera towards the book so they see the pictures. They are 3 and 5 and this is a much better way to spend time with them than just talking. The attention span for talking is short but reading a book of books keeps them engaged and excited to FaceTime with Nana.

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  • From brandon Pierce Cox on A Grandchild's Grief: When Grandparents Die

    I am 17 and I lost a grandmother when I was really young. I don’t really remember her much but im told that she was really nice and loved to play around with me and see me.Then my parents got a divorce when I was either 4 or 5 years old.Everything seemed alright but then within the last 2 years I lost an aunt who I really loved. And on top of that I don’t see much of mother maybe once or twice a full year and she has two younger girls my half sisters who I really adore and love.my steph dad use to abuse me physically not sexually then my mother and him got divorced.im afraid that like this my uncle will be the next one to go because he has heart problems and so does my grandpa and biological father and my grandmother is always falling down and im scared of what will happen sooner or later before im ready.so I now have two different sides of families with bad stuff always happening somewhere or somehow.im from a Christian family so yeah that’s that. I have know idea who’s going to be next all but that its going to be someone that I really love and this all seems to be happening all of a sudden.im always looking for advice over dealing with death for teenagers. Thanks for being willing to listen.

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  • From Yvonne Stainthorpe on Connecting with Grandchildren

    Hello, I am reading the posts of others but have not yet found the solution for my situation. I’ll try to keep it short. My single daughter passed away in Nov. 2014. She left behind 2 minor children / 13 yr old girl, and 3 yr old boy. Both have different fathers. However, she was in contact with the bio father’s mother of my 3 yr old grandson. The bio father knew about the baby but did not want anything to do with him, but his mother wanted to establish a relationship. My daughter allowed this grandmother to see my grandson. My daughter was very concerned and she was voiced to me and other family members that she did not wish these people to have any ‘say’ in raising her son because the grandmother wanted to take my grandson to Thailand for a year so that he could learn the culture. Now my daughter passed away suddenly. We did not know the Calif. law allows a bio parent to take the child from the family they are living with without any court order. My son and his wife had both children until the bio dad showed up with the Sheriff to take my grandson. To add further to this, the bio dad had my grandson’s full name changed and told the judge that he does not wish for my grandson to have any communication or contact with my family. The judge allowed the name judge in spite of our many letters of protest. The bio dad and his mother both work for CPS for which this guy mentioned to the judge, stating that he knows his rights as a father and he doesn’t want my grandson to be distracted from their bonding. In the meantime, we have no way of knowing where he is. My grandson has a sister and he has cousins who he grew up with in his short time. I want to know if anyone else had this type of situation and what did they do to obtain grandparents rights. I want my grandson to be able to visit his sister at my son’s home. I also want to file papers in the Monterey court since my granddaughter is there with my son and his family. Thank you for your response.

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  • From Angela George on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Wow, this story is almost an exact image of my situation with my in laws. Right down to the peanut allergy. My MIL thinks my son’s peanut allergy is fake. Also my 9 month old son breaks out with his eczema with gluten and she thinks that’s fake too. Oh and her smoking and scented everything doesn’t flare up my son’s asthma. I’m always wrong and she’s always right. She only had one child (my husband) and couldn’t have anymore. Not my problem. So she acts like my 2 kids are hers. Ugh.

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  • From Jeanne blouin on Smile: Grandparent Jokes

    Just love them all

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  • From Helper on Grandparent Alert: Pertussis (Whooping Cough) is on the rise and you can help!

    Hi there, this is an interesting article, however, may I suggest making some adjustments to the design of the text here? First, it is particularly difficult to read text formatted into capital letters. May I suggest that some standard font be used without making all letters in capital form? Second, the colour contrast may make it difficult for readers to see the text properly. You have dark green text on a light green background but it may make reading your article more enjoyable if you were to use a colour with a higher contrast – just plain black maybe? I know that this article is trying to urge people to take action with regards to Whopping Cough, hence it may be why this “capital-lettered” font is used, however it compromises readability. Just giving my two-cents 🙂 Please don’t take these comments to heart, I just want to improve other’s reading experience not only for this article but for the rest of the articles on this website as well.

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  • From Kerry on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    I have just heard the incredible news that my eldest daughter is pregnant…my first foray into grandmotherhood! Am finding the concept wonderful…and very frightening…so much seems hidden in the idea, not least my own ‘ageing’….and then…and then, there is this immutable fact that I live in South Africa and my girl lives in Calgary,Canada. Add to getting my head around becoming a gran is the very real knowledge that,at best, we may see one another every 3 to 4 years….(it’s just too expensive)…how am I to survive this journey with the parameters facing me?

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    • From FGP on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      HI
      Thanks for writing
      Grandparents in the same boat save their money for visits and learn how to SKYPE
      They also send Dr. Kornhaber’s book “The Grandparent Solution” (Amazon) to the parents to help them understand how
      important it is to keep their kids connected with grandparents.
      All the best.
      All the best.

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    • From Rosalind Morris on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      I will be the grandmother of my first grandchild (daughter) in 2 months time. My son and his partner live in Paris. I live in Australia. I have booked to go for 6 weeks around the birth (hopefully she won’t be early!). While I so look forward to this I am already so sad that I will have to leave and not be able to share in her daily life.I wonder how you have survived Kerry?? Any tips or inspiration will do!Thanks, Rosalind

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  • From ST on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    The mother in law has some real issues with boundaries and does not want to admit when she is at fault. In this way, foolish pride is poorly protecting, rather than properly addressing, some sort of fear she is harboring as an insecurity. When that fear is threatening the life of her grandchild and breaking the trust of the child’s parents, she is overstepping boundaries and needs to stop meddling by showing this display of self-centered irresponsibility. She needs to accept that she does not have to know everything in order to be respected and accepted into the family. In this scenario, I think the mother in law needs to see a counselor and has probably repeatedly violated her own son’s personal space in the same manner as he was growing up, if not in a worse manner. There is nothing wrong with putting boundaries with parents if the behavior is life-threatening to another person and can destroy a perfectly healthy marriage.

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  • From Nora Candelaria on The Grandparent Visitation Law

    My son and his girlfriend are refusing to let me see my grandson he is going to be three years old he was in my life here and there but never like a grandparent should have them I’m a drug-free mother that has never done anything to hurt my grandson but she refuses to let me see him and has managed to keep my son away from me as well he’s got three uncles and two aunts at that would really love to be a part of his life. I hear that you have to have certain criteria to be able to file for visitation he never lived with me parents are still alive so I don’t know if I have a chance to fight just have visitation rights with him just so he can be part of our life as well the girlfriend has managed to take my son away for me but my whole entire family do I stand a chance for visitation rights I’m not asking for i’m not asking for days if the judge would only allow me one hour per month with him I would be so happy as I haven’t seen him for over a year and that we live in the same city

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  • From Sara kidd on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    I am having a terrible time dealing with my daughter moving 5 hours away taking our 3 grands. I realize it’s her life and this was necessary but I still have such heart wrenching days. She loved family and we were such a support group for her but this is my life. I just have to deal with it the best I can. Face timing does help and I do my best to send treats every holiday.

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  • From Kathy Page on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    My son is a missionary to a foreign country and they have 5 boys and another baby on the way. We try to FaceTime when they have time, but sometimes it may be 2-3 weeks before we can catch them to talk. I know they are extremely busy with the church and homeschooling the boys but I get so down because I can’t see them or talk to them very often. My daughter has a little boy now and I was so excited that I would have a grandchild close by and then they moved 2 hours away. I use to tell my sister when her son moved 2 hours away that is was nothing compared to 5000 miles away, but I’ve since changed my mind. Sometimes 2 hours seems like such a long way.

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  • From Michele Brown on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    I have three children, two daughters and a son (youngest). Middle daughter moved with my two granddaughters with her husband to Parker, CO. three years ago for her husband’s job. They are currently moving again–to San Francisco. I live in Maryland. We do face time but with the girls now 5 and 7 and not seeing me but about once a year, they are already too busy or not interested in talking as much. It is definitely not the same as spending time with them. Oldest daughter currently lives in NJ and I have helped her a lot due to surgeries and IVF, etc., that helped her have a daughter and just this past July a set of twins (boy and girl). I have traveled there to help her out and visit frequently since the twins were born while also trying to help my aging father who lives two hours from me in the opposite direction from my daughter. (Yes, I am the sandwich generation!) I was just informed that she and her family made the decision to possibly relocate to Casper, WY! This is the daughter that was very keen on making sure that her siblings spent holidays with family and that family was more important than friends, etc. This move would involve a job change for her husband (their choice) not a requirement. She just wants to live out west. My son is also in NJ and is single. He is not close to me at all. I am remarried to a man that had no children so there is no competition with step-children. I feel used and very sad that my life decisions have been on hold so that I was available to my children and my father and that, in turn, my sacrifices will not be reciprocated and I will lose any closeness I have had with my current grandchildren. I have become very entwined with the twin babies! I am extremely depressed about this as I already know that face time, etc., is just not the same no matter what people say! Families get busy and have less and less time to devote to these things. It seems that our children, today, don’t find aging parents or grandchild-grandparent relationships palatable, important or valuable. I do have a life and have activities that I value but I put a lot on hold to take care of a parent and my daughter this year and I feel like I got sucker-punched!

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    • From Terry and Janice Beauchamp on Long-Distance Grandparenting

      We feel for you and can appreciate your pain. Our blended family includes eight children with twenty grandkids with two more on the way. All our families are spread out over five states with the closet to us being one thousand miles away. We are not able to move because of a commitment to my mom. And believe me there are days that I feel no appreciation for the sacrifices we make. Your situation is a tough one like so many of us! What we are trying to do as far as staying in touch is making as many phones calls and skyping as much as possible. Those sometimes are even difficult because of today’s busy world. I have been honest with my five children in letting them know how much I miss them and their kids. That I do realize how busy their lives are and how difficult it must be for them too. This has made a big difference in all of our families just letting each other know how important family is and how much we miss them. It is not a cure all but at least everyone is letting everyone else know in being honest they are all missed. We are still trying to figure it all out my wife and I. Not everything works the same for others and their situations. If we try the best way we can and not give up on our families then we leave a crack in that door of our relationships with our children’s and their families opened just enough to allow something good to happen. Research what you can on ideas that might work for your situation. Try to find a support group in your area. Call, skype, write a letter or card for no reason to just let your family that you were thinking about them today. Hang in there!

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  • From Laura chavez on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Ok, why is it ok to make parents let dangerous grandparents see their grandchildren, but if parents are being dangerous with their children the children would be taken away right because it’s in the child’s best interest. The child’s safety is important, and if the safety isn’t important the person no matter if its the parents or grandparents ,aunts uncles ,cousins whoever would be taken out, child safety isn’t something to be fooled with, its not being selfish or anything like that to care about the safety of your child, let’s say a aunt hurt you’re child on purpose after you let them know what was what would you let them back in to do it again? I don’t think so, does it really matter if they are family? Grandparents, aunts, uncles…. etc you want to be in the child’s life respect the child’s safety and the parents of the child’s wishes or you are out!

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  • From Dianne on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Grandparents are there to love not judge. For some reason some Grandparents feel they are entitled and cause too much drama and hard feelings in the process. Why not just be grateful for the time you spend with your grandkids and stop causing the barrier. Grandparents are not owed anything, they need to get a life and not validate their existence by the amount of time they get with the grandkids.

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  • From mad mom maw on The Grandparent Drive

    I had my only grandsons illegally kidnapped and taken out of families lives 🙁 🙁 This pain is undesirable! !!! I cry everyday for them to b returned back into our lives!! There is so much corruption and false allegations, it’s so sad to see not only our families lives ripped apart; thousands are kidnapped and go into FORCED ADOPTIONS!! There needs reform to The Family Law Act for 2016!! We have to continue the FIGHT for CHANGE!! For our families to be left alone in PEACE, LOVE, and HAPPINESS 🙂 🙂 🙂 Please BRING justice to those taking our innocent children/grandchildren from stable, loving, and Happy Homes!!! TheSe babies are MINE!!!

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  • From MaryJo Dawson on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    I find it quite disturbing to know that as single hard working Mom that someone such as a parent can be given rights to my children. I just went through this a month ago. The judicial system needs to understand that not all Grandparents are doing this for the right reasons. While some are unstable emotionally and mentally others are just questioning that authority of the parent. God forbids if something ever happens to a child in the custody of a grandparent during visitation because DNA was all that was questioned and not specific motives. In my case the judge ordered visitation to my mother not knowing all the things she had done to me and my kids. I was unaware of the visitation because I didn’t receive a summons. I then filed an appearance went back to the judge and explained that she was never denied visitation and that this was about Control and her trying to take my kids. I also explained the treacherous and devious acts towards me and my children that she has recently done like calling DCF making several false allegation reports against me and lying trying to get me arrested several times as well as going long periods without even calling or asking for the kids. Yet instill he kept her with the visitation. Only for me to leave the court room and be threatened that by my sister and my mother and cousin that they were going to do something to me when I dropped them off. Then an hour later Facebook posts threatening my life from my sister and telling people I was dead. Now these are the people who have my DNA the people who Judge Kenneth Khluerger decided to give my children too without any regard to their actions. What I can say is this is that my mother has always controlled me and I’m a grown woman who can’t raise her children in peace. The Judicial system as well as DCF allows people to Abuse it In a very vindictive manner so much so that when they permit these actions it leaves people feeling helpless, depressed, and stressed out because none of these things disappear off your record it sticks with you while they continue to manipulate the system everyday because no one can tell me about my parents they raised me and no one can tell me what’s best for my children I’m raising them.

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  • From Chery Holt, MA on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    First, I give the writer credit for sharing her story and valid concerns for her children’s psychological & physical safety.. Second, child endangerment especially regarding a food allergy is very serious. In reading the responses to the article, I was very surprised to read Grandmothers name calling, incorrectly & even diagnosing the writer at all. Stop focusing on the DIL, it is clearly about the child’s well being. For the Grandmothers, that wrote about the concern for the child’s safety first, thank you!! The Grandmothers filled with anger & lack of empathy, I hope your children are aware of your behavior and that you don’t project those negative emotions onto your grandchildren.

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  • From Heather on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    The peanut allergy section is exactly how my children’s Great Grandma is. We told her not to give our youngest (1 year old) anything with nuts… she did it any way. I’ve repeated myself many times to her and she still continues to try and give him anything and everything with peanut butter or nuts. My son is also allergic to peanut butter and nuts…but Great Grandmas keeps giving to them in tiny amounts just to try and prove us wrong. In tiny amounts he usually doesn’t have a reaction but bigger amounts he does… but he only had tiny amounts when he was on allergy medicine so I think maybe that’s why he didn’t have the reactions then.

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  • From mo on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    i think its crazy. the grandparents have a duty to be loved, they spoil the children while the parents discipline. to pull the kids away from the grandparents is the worst form of human being alive. when you die you will burn in Hell….surely there is a legal thing that can be done here. woman like this don’t think about the kids only about themselves as they are asking for a Divorce indirectly, putting the kids lives at stake..

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    • From ZWales on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      This is a very intense reaction that seems indicative of how you approach conflict. This approach is asking for trouble. Unfortunately, there are parents who struggle emotionally and they will most likely be grandparents one day who will still be struggling emotionally. I have sympathy and concern for people who have mental illnesses, but children growing up with mentally ill parents suffer through a lot. When they themselves grow up, they are wise to distance themselves from their parent unless their mental illness is well controlled. This means protecting their own children from grandma/grandpa. This is what good parents do. It’s not easy and certainly there is disappointment and loss involved, but not because grands are kept from grandparents, but because it’s a loss that grandparents cannot or will not manage their illnesses and traumas that bleed out onto others. Your comment sounds like you have serious history with your children and understandably miss your grandchildren, but your child(ren) is wise to keep them out of the way so that they’re not hurt by your own emotional confusion.

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  • From Giracelma De Ceita on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    I am 15 years old my grandmother lives in Angola and I in South Africa she.My Gran is 85 years old I have last see her 5 years ago my parents is separated and my father is always promising I will see my grandmother what can I do to make it possible for me to see my grandmother, I am so afraid I will not have a opportunity to see my gran and tell her I love her.

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  • From Karen s messier on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    My first grandson is going to be born this month and I was told that I will only be allowed to see him for 1/2hr when he is born and then I will be escorted out by my daughter in law dr and I will never be able to see him ever again and my own son will not even stay around when I’m their we have not talked in over 7 years I’ve tried but no luck I even texted his wife and found myself in court from them wanted nothing to do with me at all to leave them alone that’s all they want I was told from the lady we had to see one of us at a time I was told I need to leave them alone and have no contact ever again and that I have a mental problem and that I was an alcoholic I gave up drinking in 2006 and I have meds for depression and when I needed the help I put my self in the hospital for a week to get help and that worked for me in 2007 and with that help I became my good old self again but I am still a bad person to my son and his wife so I am being punished for my past and they will not let it go so how do I ever get to see my very first grandson and be apart of his live?

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  • From Nora Lopez on The Grandparent Visitation Law

    The future is our children. Responsible grandparents should make every effort to be a vital part of their granchild’s life; more so, when the parent or parents are negligent and or abusive.

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  • From Nora Lopez on The Grandparent Visitation Law

    Christian granny, lives a squeeky clean lifestyle is denied visitation rights to her great grandson by the envious mind sick mother and grandmother; denying the child the love, affection, attention and care great grandmother hajoyfully given to the child for the first 17 months of his life. It’s just plain wrong.

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  • From Aurora Dawn on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I think all of you grandparents who have condemned this woman are sick and I hope eventually the pain you have which makes you so hateful and selfish goes away. Children are not anyone’s entitlement, they are a responsibility out of genuine love. Children are weak vulnerable and impressionable and they need to be loved and cared for. It has nothing to do with this person or that person “deserves” a child… ALL children deserve to be loved by ALL the adults in thier life and thier best interests put first. If an adult can not do that then they are not ready to be an adult in a childs life.

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  • From Rona Karenke on Characteristics of Effective Grandparents

    Excellent read. I am encouraged to be healthy so I can continue being actively involved with my grandchildren. This is what my life is all about. I have never felt so connected as I do now in my life as a Grandmother.

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  • From laura mcmillan on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    My mum craves so badly an overnight stay with my son who is 8. And I would love nothing more because I know she loves him to the end of the earth but I just can’t bring myself to allow it because when she has him on her own for a long period of time he comes home a different boy. It’s like somehow she gets into his mind and try her best to turn him against me and his father, (my ex partner) she also takes speed quite a lot not every day but when she does she turns into a horrible person who wants to turn my son against us all. My mum also spiked me when I was breastfeeding my daughter just part of a sick game so she could try and take my son of me. I cringe when I think of what could have happened. She was trying to set me up to look like an unfit mother. She suffers from psychological problems, but my son loves her so very much so I allow him to see her once a week for a couple of hours but the thought of her having him overnight makes me cringe 🙁 please tell me I am right in sticking to no overnight access. Thanks in advance

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    • From Konoha on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Drug use around the child is a massive safety concern. You are not at all wrong in not wanting to leave your child alone with your mother overnight. You have a duty to protect your son. When he is an adult he can decide for himself how much time he wants to spend with grandma while she’s high, but you owe it to him to protect him until then.

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  • From Aliya jorieh alsulami on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    Lolo,did you remember me that your my grandpa? Now your in God’s kingdom I love you and miss you 🙁

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  • From TIRED OF RIDICULOUS on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    If everyone could please go back to the original. I moved my MIL in almost two years ago and she has no desire to spend time with our children but seems to get a snotty tude when it comes to “grandparent rights”. I grew up with abbusive neglectful druggy parents and had wonderful grandparents (paternal) who were always there for me. Those grandparents are the ones who truly deserve to be in those children’s lives. Snotty ENTITLED “grandparents” do not belong in any child’s life!!!! As long as the children have healthy lives the only job of the REST of the family members are to mentor, encourage and love these children. Parents are the only ones entitled to these children unless they are selfish a@@holes like I had. As I started my comment….the woman I moved in isn’t drug addicted or abbissive, however, she is a lazy narsastistic troll who has lived with her grandchildren and never embraced it. I have zero tolerance for anyone who feels they deserveX Y and Z. Clearly, if you are the one to take offense to the starting comment…you need help. This PC BS world that has allowed all to rights and privlege need to grow a set and grow up. Just because you F$&?ED up as parents doesn’t mean you get a redo to F&@? it up again. Let GOOD PARENTS BE GOOD PARENTS! Sit back, shut up and embrace what is

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  • From Todd b. Hagberg on A Grandchild's Grief: When Grandparents Die

    Hello , im Todd 33years of age . Just this last july 2015 on the 8th wich just happens to be the exact day just two years prior was my daughter’s birthday, the first great grandchild in our family, in wich my grandmother passed on to a better place. I will always hold her close , i chose to be near her the most out of the many other family members who were there selectively . I had never really delt with real death until i held my grandmother softly in the hospital room , and as i gave her a soft kiss on her cheek she also took her last deep breath. She will always be with me in more than one way , this i shure can say. Love you grandma Doris Hagberg this said by your loving grandson Todd b. Hagbergc#612-250-3177 thank you ♡

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  • From Janelle Goodman on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    I am raising my 4 grandchildren. Been doing this now for almost 18 years. One right after the other kept coming. I finally got custody if the last 2 almost 2 years ago.they are all doing well. My husband suffers from dementia , thank goodness I’m in fairly good health. They are 18, 14, 10 and 8. Grandparents put their lives on hold to care for these children. They are need to be praised for all they have done. Thank you grandparents…..

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  • From Candle on A Grandchild's View of Divorce

    I try my best to do this with my grandkids. Recently we have started taking them one at a time overnight. ( I watch both before and after school) We have Dad over from time to time but the two parents refuse to speak to each other so itis a tightrope. Es maintain a neutral ground for the kids as best we can but yes, Mom (my daughter) would like it if I didn’t have contact with ex SIL. Oh well damned if you do and damned if you don’t. I side with the kids, they need the best of both. Prayers always welcome 🙂

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  • From Survivor on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Many “Baby Boomers” we’re narcissistic, abusive parents. In my case, the abuse – physical and psychological was real. I grew up in fear of having the snot beat out of me for merely expressing emotion, an opinion, or a desire. I was kicked, yelled at, ridiculed, and sabotaged by my father. I watched him beat my pets. I sat in the back seat of the car as a child while he terrorized my family spinning doughnuts in a dirt lot with the car – with the entire family in the car, as part of one of his rage attacks. I was even subjected to at least one round of sexual abuse by him (probably mentally blocked out others). Any time I disagreed with him, he challenged me to a fist fight. Finally, at age 28 I agreed to his challenge, and beat him up. That was the last time he pulled that bullying stunt. However, he and my mother continue today (10 years later) to regularly violate boundaries. With the above in mind, he and my mother will not have contact with my children. Abuse is real. If a parent chooses to not let their parent see their child, it is for good reason. It is unfortunate that my child will only know one side of his family (and grandparents), but the absence of a set of grandparents is much better than subjecting a child to harm by an abusive grandparent. Some grandparents can’t be trusted.

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  • From www.tabwrapper.com on Have a Favorite grandchild?

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  • From Eden Davis on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I would cut off contact for awhile. Maybe not permanently, you will have to wait and see if any significant improvements in the grandparents’ behavior. If there aren’t, then keep your kid safe by keeping grandparents away. I have some experience with the food issues as well, although it has to do my own nonfood llergies and my dogs’ food allergies as well (yes I know there is a big difference between dogs and kids, but in these instances there are definitely disturbing similarities.) we would go swimming at Lake Tahoe pretty often in the summer (we lived close by on the Nevada side). I happened to be severely allergic to a thing called PABA that used to be one of the main ingredients in a lot of sunscreens (not all, and none have it anymore thankfully. The one store that had the PABA-free sunscreens was a place that my mom claimed she hated, and she just wouldn’t go there. She even got upset with my dad for going there to get the sunscreen, and after he put it away and left the room,she took the sunscreen and threw it in the trash outside. So every time she would take me to the lacks (my dad is a geologist so he used to be gone a lot in summer. So my mom… definitely does a lot of magical thinking. Fist, she would make me put on the sunscreen I wasn’t supposed to be to touching at all. The she would tell me to quick get in the water so it will come off soon, and then you won’t get hives!! It never worked… but the last time was the worst by far… She put the sunscreen on me, told me to get in the water. She must have put a lot on my forehead, because (and thankfully this is the only time this happened) giant glob of italics from my forehead into my eye. I had to be rushed to the hospital with chemical-like burns and a blister in my eye. And she and my grandmother (her mom) both routinely gave my dog things like chocolate cake, alcohol, caffeinated stuff. He has an allergy to beef and gets bad ear infections if he has it. Somehow, he always gets one a couple days after seeing family… Sorry for the long rant!! I can definitely relate to not being able to trust family members with things that are really important!!

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  • From Veronica James on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    People are moving away from grandparents because you idiots expect ‘day to day grand-parenting’ as a thing. I’d shoot myself in the head if I lived in a nightmare of ‘day to day’ if my spouses parents expected day to day anything with my family (spouse, child, me – yep we’re nuclear family). What the hell are you people smoking? No body wants you in their home everyday – get a life and get a hobby, because your adult children and their families are NOT a retirement plan. As long as grandparents expect ‘ day to day’ grand-parenting families will keep moving away for their sanity. What is this? Everybody loves Raymond?

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  • From Anne Rosa on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    Not all problems are with the grandparents. Some parents are seriously mentally unstable, but can not be proven so. Through all these sick scenarios, the only ones that suffer are the children. Let me just say that probably 99% of grandparents love their grandchildren more than life and should be allowed at least the chance to prove that love. Even if it means supervised visitation at first, they should at least be able to see and talk to them. Most people don’t understand the incredible feelings of love grandparents have for these children until they become grandparents themselves.

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    • From Chris H on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      Nobody loves a child more than their parent, so yes people understand the amount of love you can have. If someone doesn’t treat me well then why on earth would I let them be around my children? If you have respect for your children and their spouse and you are part of their life then you are included in the lives of their children. If you can’t be respectful to the parents then you have no right being involved with the kids.

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    • From Ivette on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      I agree with you totally. I have a parent like relationship with my granddaughter yet the lies her mother has told DCF and has made my granddaughter report to DCF, I now cannot see her!! My granddaughter dreads going home when she’s with me and grandpa!! DCF is supposed to help keep the child safe and psychologically stable, they are adding to her instability. After $ 15,000 + in attorney fees to see my granddaughter I now have to retain another attorney and fight again just to see her!!

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  • From Christine Denisco on Editorial: Mistakes Grandparents Make

    I personally don’t like anyone so involved in my child’s life or my life for that matter. I’m struggling to understand why grandparents can’t just be satisfied with whatever is most comfortable to the parents? Why be so pushy to have the level of contact YOU want? Why not ask the parents how much involvement they are wanting from the grandparents? My daughter is 6 months old and my MIL (first time grandma by blood) is INCESSANT about spending time and money on my daughter. I love her very much, but it is strange to me that she is borderline obsessed with my baby. Her Facebook is filled with pictures of my daughter and in all the comments she call her “My baby”. Ummm that’s weird. She makes me take pictures of my daughter wearing the clothes she bought her, which I tell her we really don’t need (I literally have huge massive piles of clothes in every size until my girl is two years old!) Every time we travel to see her we barely get out of the CAR and she is already literally grabbing my baby from my arms without asking, without saying hello to me, and then recently she started running (literally) inside and bringing my baby into a back room and shutting the door. What??! I asked her why she was doing that and she just brushed it off saying she had to get something in the room. I’m exclusively breastfeeding and every time my daughter would get hungry like start getting fussy and rooting and giving early cues I would say, okay she is hungry now, and my mother in law would literally ignore me like I hadn’t even spoken and start playing with her exaggeratedly and do everything to distract her. This results in a baby who goes from fussy to screaming in hunger because she is putting her needs to play with the child over the child’s need to eat. To make matters worse, even after my baby start crying hysterically, my MIL thinks she can pick her up and sing a song and she will stop crying. I gently remind her that she is hungry now and I need to feed her and she won’t hand over my baby. I literally have to say over and over again “She’s hungry! She’s hungry!” It’s ridiculous. We usually stay a couple nights ( they are a twelve hr drive) and every night she insists on keeping my baby up past bedtime and planting her in front of the TV. She is aware of the bedtime and also aware that we are a no TV family and baby is not to watch. We do not own one and believe it is a waste of time and precious moments for connecting and learning. It also has been proven to lead to behavior disorders, not to mention the insane amount of targeted advertising I’m very uncomfortable with. The AAP recommends ZERO TV for a child under 2 yrs and then very limited if any. My daughter is 6 months old!! And propped up on my MIL’s knee right in front of the TV. Seriously?! Then, every morning she comes into the guest room while we are still sleeping, turns on the lights and starts calling my daughters name. She wakes up obviously and normally her routine is to nurse herself awake, which means she eats right before waking up. This meal is important as it sets up if we’re going to have a good day or a fussy day. My MIL disregards when I say I need to feed her and tells my I need to stay in bed with my husband and she can watch her in the living room for a while. The first couple times I agreed to this but I won’t again. The first time she took her out and gave her powder formula (which was from when her dogs had puppies recently and she was feeding the runt). She didn’t tell me she did it, and after a while I was wondering why she wasn’t crying to be nursed since she missed her morning meal. I went out into the living room and asked for my baby saying she was surely getting hungry as it had been a few hours. As soon as I picked her up, she threw up a ton of yellowish liquid. She had NEVER thrown up before, and since it had been hours since she last ate, I was almost certain she had given her formula. I said, OmG I’ve never seen her throw up like that EVER?! I wonder if she’s okay? And my mother in law was very dismissive and said, oh she’s fine I’ll just clean it up. She later went to run errands and I looked around and found the formula all the way in the very back of a top cabinet that had nothing else in it and was obviously trying to be hidden away. She knows I would never ever give my baby formula unless it was a life or death situation, but still she chose to do it because she wanted to spend more alone time with my baby before she started to cry for nursing. Again putting her needs above the child’s. She doesnt ever ask me if anything is okay with me before she does it. Why is that so hard? One time she put a raspberry yogurt covered pretzel in her mouth when she was only 4 1/2 months old, right in front of me! I politely said, we are just breastfeeding for at least the first six months and then only whole, simple veggies to start. She said oh it’s just a little yogurt but okay okay. I told her to read the ingredients and that it was not just yogurt but a host of processed and refined sugars, chemicals, and preservatives. My MIL wolfs down her meal and grabs the baby from me during ever meal, even when my daughter is perfectly happy to sit on my lap while I eat, which I love. She just acts like I’m just the milk machine and every other waking second she is taking her from me. Can someone please tell me why she is doing these things? I want them to have a relationship, but I need to be respected as my child’s mother. I don’t need my husbands mom living out her fantasy of having a daughter of her own by playing mommy to my little baby!

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  • From Sabiha Ali on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    My Father -in law is a very dominating person. My husband(50 years old!) is terrified of his dad and would do anything to please him.
    He and my MIL visit us every year for a month or so (they live in another country).
    Recently my FIL has become more and more short-tempered. On the last few visits he has started to shout/howl/shriek at the slightest of excuses (eg my 12 year old daughter giggling at dinner time).Instead of being horrified at his dad’s behaviour, my hubby started to shout at my daughter too! My daughter was shivering when I found her later. Me and my son hugged her- but she was shaken at this betrayal by her dad. My kids are very sensitive, talented and extremely well-behaved kids- their teachers, friends, any body who knows them adores them. FIL once found my 7 year old son playing on his i-pad while FIL slept on the sofa -afternoon nap.It woke him up. He started to pinch,and howl at my son and pushed him telling him to get out of the living room. My son was so shocked and terrified- he just stood there crying- while his grandfather pushed him out of the room and shut the door on my sons hands-hurting him.I was too shocked to react- I told my hubby who then asked his father and his dad just laughed it off. As far as my husband is concerned the matter ended there.
    On our last visit to there house, my kids got into an argument-(how kids squabble sometimes )and it apparently disturbed the grandfathers peace, it set off the grandfather again –he started to shout and this time he threw water at their faces- these are now 16,14 and 9 year olds! Then he heard me talking to my husband and he told us to shut up!
    They are nightmare guests- will not lift a finger-want freshly cooked specific meals after I return home at 5:30 pm –the first thing I hear is my MIL ordering me to cook such and such dish- its another story I have started to totally ignore her. She finds faults in every dish that I make-even though I have told by most of my guests how wonderful they taste!
    MIL is another story- she can sing praises about herself non-stop!
    My husband is emotionally very attached to his parents- they use that to control me and the kids- because they know he is closer to them than he his to his own kids.
    My in-laws now want to visit us for a few months every year and the idea is so terrifying. When they are here my FIL needs to be in control- he would stop my kids from visiting or inviting their friends The kids have to spend all their time sitting in the lounge with the grandparents- while the grandparents are on internet chatting to their daughters, watching TV- in short totally ignoring the grandchildren.
    I really don’t know how to deal with all this- I know whatever I say falls on deaf ears and they are of the firm belief that they are ideal people.

    Its really sad when I think of the wonderful loving memories I have of my grandparents and feel so bad for my kids who actually don’t look forward to meeting their grandparents.

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  • From Jerri Allington on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    What does everyone think?????
    Im currently pregnant with my first, I do not know my boyfriends family nor do I want too. He and his siblings where taken from him mother by social services and the woman is crazy. She has been calling for months insisting on coming down and seeing the baby when he’s here, offering to help. I have flatly refused. I will not allow this woman who is a total stranger to both myself and to her son, she also pays no attention the the grandson she already has, to be anywhere near my child. She wasn’t capable of looking after her own and she won’t be allowed to see my baby. What the woman described in her post, especially with the allergy, I would not allow her anywhere near my baby, and quite frankly Id have it out with her. She sounds like a spiteful cow!

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  • From Chantal on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    My vovo died December 31 2015. It was the saddest day of my life. We sat around for a week with him while he was at hospice at home were he wanted to be. I was bye his side along with my aunt’s uncles mom and cousins. Hell always be in my heart. He’s the only father I ever had. I miss and pray to u everyday vovo. Please watch over us. I love u 🙁

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  • From Williambut on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    Great forum.Much thanks again. Awesome. Barke

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  • From mommabear on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I have had the exact same problems with my mil, deliberately putting my daughter in harms way to prove me wrong and/or trying to prove that she is the one in control. She said to me when my daughter was a couple of months old that she couldn’t wait for the day for my daughter to talk back to me. She was very angry with me for not allowing overnight babysitting. I am a stay at home mom and I didn’t want to leave her at that age with anyone, especially since I was breastfeeding every couple of hours still. My daughter has a chronic illness that my mil refuses to acknowledge. I invited her to one of our specialist appointment because she doesn’t believe anything I tell her. During the appointment she thought it was appropriate to start gaslighting the specialist. Asking her REPEATEDLY if she was sure about the diagnosis she made. She regularly ignores any boundaries we try to set with her and she doesn’t ask, she demands babysitting which I haven’t said ok to as of yet. I now will leave her with people that I trust. She once took off with my daughter when she was a month old without saying anything to me or my husband. I had no idea where she had gone with my daughter. I could go on and on about everything that has happened but I think that you get the idea. I wasn’t sure at the time what was wrong with her and why she seems to have so much spite towards me until I started reading about narcissistic personality disorder. Now all of her patterns of behaviour make sense. Sadly she has all nine traits in my opinion. I know that I’m not qualified to diagnosis her. Its my opinion based on 2 years of consistent research on personality disorders and some experience taking care of patients with this disorder. I have also spoke to my doctor about her. Her said he cant diagnosis her remotely but based on what I’ve told him it sounds like that is the case. She comes from a very large family and her parents died when she was young. She has admitted that she was never close to her parents when they were alive. I do feel sorry about the childhood she had. In my opinion every child deserves to be loved and protected. Narcissism is a learned behaviour from childhood abuse/neglect. I have come to accept that my mil is never going to change or be accountable for anything that she has done. My husband and I have decided to go low contact with her for the sake of our childs safety, our marriage and our sanity. I love my daughter more than anything else. I’ll do whatever it takes to protect her from anyone who has an abusive nature. Does anyone know of any childrens books that will educate them about people who are abusive?

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    • From Patty Luna on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      If you’re dealing with NPD, be wary of ANY contact. I’m in the same situation. DH and I both had parents with NPD. I am no contact for several years and it’s been a huge difference for the better in me. Hubby struggles with low contact, even though they did intend to place our twins in grave harm. Tried to use every weapon in their arsenal to make us do what they felt entitled to. Harassed us constantly for over a year to bring the kids over to their house, where one of their animals harbor a rare and untreatable pathogen that one of my kids developed bacterial meningitis from. My daughter was only 6 weeks old, had only a 1% chance of survival (we were very lucky) and nearly died. She has mild brain damage. The 4 specialists at one of the best children’s hospital in the nation, told us that a repeated exposure would definitely be fatal. We told them this and they still demanded us to bring them over and refused to give up the reptile with the bacteria. They wouldn’t visit us, even though they used to frequently and unannounced. Even though they were invited. It had to be their way, no exceptions. It was the most evil and depraved way I’ve seen anyone behave. A power trip was worth their granddaughter likely dying? And they bullied my husband mercilessly to try and make him put his already sick and weak baby, in mortal danger. He was so brainwashed and conditioned to do what they wanted, he pleaded with me to obey them and comply. I’m not terrified by them and don’t believe they are entitled to get whatever they want. I had to fight my husband and stay vigilant and didn’t leave the kids in his care without me for a long time. Drove a wedge between us. He resented me for making his parents upset and making him a bad son. This is not uncommon for people who grew up in NPD homes. He still can’t bear to go no contact (and there has been so much more, they are hell bent on breaking us up) says nothing when they malign me to him. I don’t allow them access to my kids. They pop by on occasion for brief visits behind my back. But there’s rarely opportunity. I’d leave but then I know my husband would let them do whatever they wanted during his visitations. They will hurt my kids to get back at me and I have to make sure it never happens. These toxic grandparents ruined his oldest son from a previous marriage. He has traits of antisocial personality disorder. They had the full control and access to him they felt entitled to have. Toxic grandparents ruin marriages, their own kids, their grandkids and anyone else they have power over. Don’t let your kids near them. They don’t benefit in any way from them. Being family gives no one the right to harm anyone, especially kids. You are being a GOOD parent by not allowing this. Don’t let guilt eat you up, you have done the right thing. The toxic grandparents carry the shame and blame for the necessary steps we must take to protect our kids. The shame is on anyone who believes these people should get what they want. They blame me for destroying their close, happy family. I bent over backwards for them before I had kids. I’ve never behaved badly to them, always polite, etc. But they have a special hatred for me and my husband still is loyal to them. I’m heartbroken. Some of the posters who are on the grandparents side are likely NPD or something like that. It’s mind bending to anyone who hasn’t experienced it firsthand. We tried to work things out for years and also used therapeutic mediation. They cannot be reasonable and thinking that talking or taking steps to communicate to them and working things out is a possibility need to go on some ACON sites. Adult children of narcissist sites are the best sources. Therapists often don’t truly understand what they’re actually like and give bad advice. Good for this mom, this poster, who stood up to these people. I just have to say how lucky you are to have a husband who supports you in this and doesn’t live in denial that his parents are perfect and supreme. Be grateful he didn’t make you the enemy and resent you for keeping your children safe. Mine has no anger toward them, but contempt for me. It’s a horrible life knowing your husband puts them first and never makes you his priority. Leaving will only put my kids in harms way and I’ll die before letting harm and emotional damage come to them, especially in the way the in laws do it. All the mothers who do as we do, deserve a medal for the hell we fiercely walk into to protect our kids. We ARE good parents, good people. I applaud you.

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      • From mommabear on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Thank you Patty Luna! I hope everything works out for you.

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      • From Sandy on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

        Definitely tough and I’ve dealt with some of this. I even thought when it got so bad “I can’t leave, he will just run to them”. Thankfully, he finally opened his eyes. It took him over 2 years and seeing how own son disrespected and mistreated for him to realize what his parents have been doing to him and to me since day 1. Luckily, he loves his son more. I felt crazy until someone explained the NPD parent to me and I started to share the literature with my husband. It still hurts him but I always say “It’s their choice”. They aren’t in our lives because they choose not to respect our marriage, our home and us as parents. They have done everything from throw parties at our home and left it trashed while we were on our honeymoon to bringing his ex around just to get a rise out of me. In addition to a slew of legal and drug things I won’t get into here but suffice it to say I’m a mandated reporter and it became dangerous for me to associate with them. They have disrespected our child in doing all of the above and I explained how it was not healthy for a son to grow up watching his father be disrespected by people who say they love him. That gives a bad example of love, it gives a bad example of a man. They are broken people. But that is neither you or your child’s problem nor is it your job to fix or give them a chance. They should have been on their knees in tears and pain thinking that they could have killed your daughter but still they insist. Clearly they don’t care about her or how it would have killed you both to lose her. That’s dangerous. You do deserve a medal. You are a good mom and a good wife. You won’t tolerate anyone abusing your family. I’ve seen the damage that NPD grandparents cause their grandkids who watch them abuse their parents. I watched a grandmother call her son a failure in front of her grandson and how it broke him to watch his father just “take it”. If your husband isn’t strong enough to stand up to them then you need to take whatever steps necessary to protect them both. He doesn’t see it now, hopefully in time he will. Hopefully he gets to see his kids grow up with a self-confidence and self-assuredness that blows him away and hopefully he will come to see the difference in upbringing that brought that about. You are fighting for you family and you have every right to do so.

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  • From NAIM BOUTROS on Characteristics of Effective Grandparents

    Thank you very much for an excellent reading.I am not sure whether this is the right place for what I am writing. My wife and I are over 65 and live on a modest pension. our married daughter and 2 toddler live with her husband as expat in Emirates (very good income). My daughter spends most of summer here in UK. they stay with us which of course we love to enjoy the kids. My problem is my wife always overdo things, she prepares and feed kids, change their nappies, bath them, clean the mess after them including utensils and food remains, do the washing, etc. I have done some of this myself but my point is I now think that this has gone too far. We do the shopping including baby stuff, my wife even spend good time of her shopping just to get children stuff, cloths, books toys etc. My daughter spends most of her time on the phone talking to hubby, friends, shopping Texting etc. Even when goes shopping, she hardly buy things for house; only occasionally buys food for herself or children. I had once or twice pointed out to her that the full fat milk has finished and if she can buy some for her children, she then only buys this and may be one or two packets of stuff she herself likes to eat. My wife cleans the house, tidy toys etc. When husband joins in he never brings any thing in the house, except occasionally if they take children out AND BUY THEM THINGS. Am I being silly or I have a point?

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  • From Sandra Gest on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    What I have noticed reading these comments are grand parents are much more duress ted than they use to be. But then so are parents. I will never understand the lack of compromise. I have noticed, even when somebody is heartbroken over a situation, many have responded very coldly. This generation raising our our grandchildren seem self-centered and pompous and unyeilding. But that is what we raised. If we didn’t care , our adult children would be mad. If we care too much, we are smothering. It all feels like a power play. I love my Grandkids..I would love to be a part of their lives…I am here if they want me. If not, ….well,I have a lifew of my own. I have noticed the sons mother and father are the losers. As for the Mom with allergies..if the parents put your children in jeopardy, then they need super used visits. If the Mother who won’t drive and won’t leave her children, and who has spent so much time with her child that he can skip grades…won’t compromise..won’t even have the grandparents at her house? Too much lacking in this story….but she sounds like a nut.. Husband/ Father needs to step in before she makes her kids crazy too. They must have done alright with their son if she fell in love with him, right?

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  • From Tammy ryan on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Bombarding the mother that is doing all she can for her children as I would be just as angry about it and this woman has every right to feel the way she does especially her husband. If siding with the abusive ways of the mother in law that gave the child skim milk to a child that is allergic to the substance in the first place. Seriously people, if your child was allergic WOULD take that risk to get back the mother because you never liked her? That is clearly child endangerment in my view as no woman that is a grandparent should behave so spiteful like that.

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    • From mommabear on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I agree Tammy Ryan. Deliberately placing a child in harms way IS child abuse. Endangering the grandchild to get back at the mother is sick in my opinion. Its not about love, its about power. Its sad that this is so common. Patty Luna thank you again for your reply. I’m so sorry to hear about what has gone on in your family. I really do hope everything works out for you and that your kids are kept safe!

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  • From John Anderson on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I am a father of one and am also a single son to my parent. I keep my parent away from my son and my wife completely. Not one visit in 2 years so far. It hurt me to do it but I have too. I invited them into our home when my son was born. I wanted them to feel joy of seeing and taking care of grand children. But it ended up having them mentally and physically hurting my wife, my son and me. Our home become their home and their rules. Me and my wife are the kind that dont like issues or confrontations so my parent keep pushing us. When pushing us to the edge doesnt work they start scheming on situation which give me and my wife a hard time. Other times they would have try to brain wash my son when he was young behind my back. Telling my son mommys bad grandpas best etc….I even suspected them posioning my wife and her family. Of course when i first invited them in i was blind from seeing all these issues because my love for my parents, my busy family life and work schedules. Its doesnt help that my wife is one of those woman whom never complaint and keep things to herself. It was torture for her for almost 5+ years. It was also torture for me mentally. It also brought out the worst in my parents. Any grandparents with not perfect characteristic should never get involve with their kids family. Leave them along even if you think they have the worst spouse in the world. They will learn by themself. They need life experience. You lived yours its their turn good or bad. Its funny how in my case my wife and me are the rich one in the family. We are rich. We support our parents life expenses and they live in our house and we still ended up moving out…lol. any way some day i will be the best grand father and in law ever after my experience

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  • From Amber on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Hi I would just like to say that i do not think all grandparents are bad but some are, Me coming into a family whereby i am a different race and different cultures side of my husband they do everything different and for me i was difficult since the day i met his mother i felt that something was not right about her but ignored it and so my husband and i stayed at his parents house for 3 years and his sister was jealous of me because i married her brother this is what the MIL said and they said that is normal to me that wasnt normal because i got cousins who has brothers and dont behave that way his mother always put me down and did things and said things to hurt me they never ever had anything good to say about me once my first child was born they took my child away from me every time breast feed my i couldnt complain to my husband to my mother sisters no one i felt alone with my thoughts everyday, they actually took advantage of the soft person i was everybody told me to leave them when they are saying bad things about me, but it got to much i tried and tried to tell my husband what was happening but didnt listen but one day i left it in gods hands and he saw everything for himself how his mother treated me and FIL one day i made potato curry how the indians cook his father spat the food out because of no salt you must know i was 22 and just learning how to cook their foods then all the emotional abuse didnt stop after 7 years of being in the family they can accept me because i am a different race and come from a broken home my husband took us and moved out of their house once he saw what they did to me and i stared to speak up for myself and telling them when they are telling me something i dont like or they being rude everytime his family would fight with me i would never keep the kids away even though they are cruel to never i had a partry for the kids it really was an expensive parrty because we didnt have party for the girls and his family i had fight before the party but still i invited them and the unthinkable happed they fought with me my family mainly me his sister pulled my hair and brother was hitting me and as much as i wanted to hit his sister for doing that i couldnt because they attacked me like that and after that i didnt let them to see the kids because im scared and dont know what they will do to me.

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  • From Cynthia Kendall on A Home for Grandparent-Grandchild Families

    The Grandparent Family Apartments is an absolutely brilliant idea. I just hope it can be implemented in all areas. I have custody of 2 of my grandchildren and we are waiting for a larger place through the county housing authority. I’m still new to this and many times find it very overwhelming. Right now we are living in a 1 bedroom apartment and the kids belongings are in baskets. We are waiting to get access to the place they were living with their father, so we can get more of their belongings. He is incarcerated here and their mother is incarcerated in another state. I have had partial custody of them since she left 10 years ago. I had been working, but have had to stop due to court dates and various other appointments. The children have various issues that need to be addressed. They have had so many changes occur in their lives this summer. They’ve had to change schools and their physical and emotional needs need to be met. There is just so much that needs done, but I know I can only do one thing at a time.

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  • From Jennifer Dunning-Maloley on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I will never understand how mothers can be so MEAN to each other…..shame on you all..not your life, not your story, not in her shoes. UN believable

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  • From Sarah on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    My parents are wonderful for the most part, but the thought of grandparents’ rights is terrifying to me, and I don’t even have kids yet. I can only imagine how anxiety-inducing it is for people whose parents are less stable. What nonsense. I’ve already decided that my father will not be allowed to drive my future children around unless I’m also in the car, because I know how his driving skills have slipped, and he’ll only get worse from here on out. The thought of a court telling me it’s not my decision because he might want to take my kids somewhere during visitation makes me want to move to another country.

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  • From Kathy talcott on Editorial: Mistakes Grandparents Make

    I’m a grandma. I used to keep my prescriptions in kitchen cupboard. I dropped a pill and because my daughter was coming in and other guests, I was unable to find that pill that seemed to just disappear. I was going to sweep but never got the time. My other daughter found the pill and told her sister ( who has kids) that she found pill on floor. I have since then placed all pills in bedroom armoire,quite high up. A couple years later my grandkids were visiting unexpectedly. My routine when babysitting was to search the house for anything harmful,childproof the cabinents and close all doors. I wasn’t able to do this that day because of the unexpectedness of visit. I can’t remember why or when I left a bottle of homeopathic pills out. My daughter was sitting nearest to the bottle along with her two older chilren(about 6 and4) I was in kitchen making us all lunch. When I got the chance to sit down I noticed the kids were under a fort blanket and the pills spilt out on the floor. Mom rushed youngest to ER. Was told by Dr. that she couldn’t have been harmed by pills because they were homeopathic and nothing was needed to bee done . Then awhile later(either that year or later) her son went into bedroom and in my nightstand were 3 of the same homeopathic pills that I had dropped some time ago. Again my routine to safeguard was interrupted by Lacey dropping in and I was making lunch for 5) and I had not closed the bedroom door. Realized my mistake,ran to close door – we all got thre at same time. I was sick at heart and felt miserable. The next day daughter took grandson to Dr. Because he wasn’t feeling well- turns out he had a ear infection. Unbeknownst to my daughter, I showed up at Dr, with pills from home(3) in case she needed to show the Dr. I was crying the whole time in Dr. Office. My daughter said that Grady wasn’t sick due to ingestion but ear ache and told me she just couldn’t handle another pill problem I agreed and went home to seek out any other place pills could be. Nothing more was said and I still babysat ,while hyper aware of safety. Nothing happened again. But many months down the road my daughter told me she was too worried and the two youngest (whom I had been babysitting since) I was no longer allowed to babysit and could only be at my house with her there. Needless to say, my heart broke – my DAUGHTER NO LONGER TRUSTED ME. She went back to that Dr. Who had told her NOT to let me babysit the two youngest. So now a Dr,. Thinks I’m a negligent caregiver,my daughter distrust s me and I can’t seem to stop crying . My daughter doesn’t understand me being upset because,after all, the safety of her kids was the most important thing. And that I was selfish to be upset. I really wanted to talk to her about more safety measures like childproof all doors and sweep before she left,but refused to consider. What can i do . I can’t win back her trust- she won’t talk about it. I am willing to try anything,even going to a therapist.HELP

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  • From Gayle Lewis on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    grandma did wrong in feeding the baby something she should not have.In my case how about being banned from seeing a grand child due to a child marrying a Sex offender and the REAL dad of the child was not told. this little girl was under 2 yrs of age when the mom married a reg. sex offender. Now the grandma is blamed for all sorts of things not even related to the situation. the mom failed to tell the real dad and should have lost her place as custodial parent. the mom decided to get ugly and blames grandma for telling the real father, ( she did not do so ) when its all over the internet had he just looked. this couple was married for 9 yrs. Suddenly grandma is thrown under the bus and the real dad is not allowed to let Grandma see his daughter. The grandma is the mother of the mom of the child. when does An RSO have more rights that the only living REAL grandma

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  • From Dove Texas on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    As a grandparent myself I’m just wondering why with the latest technology like Skype and other technology that’s out there there’s really no excuse for grandparents to see their grandchildren even if it’s on video only. It’s just as important for grandchildren to know that their grandparents love them very much but it also helps grandparents not feel neglected. Love lost one grandchild who passed away when he was almost 8 years old. My son and daughter-in-law divorced shortly after and now I don’t get to see my other grandchildren. I would be forever grateful if I could communicate with them thru Skype or even with letters. I always respected their parents rules and expectations. I never put them through any harm. Any harm that would occur to them was on their parent’s watch not mine. My grandkids always loved to spend time with me it was always grandma, grandma, grandma, I miss them dearly and I pray for them daily.

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  • From Anne Elizabeth Colturi on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    Hello, my name is Anne E Colturi. I am a grandmother to two beautiful granddaughters and I am a part of both their lives. These two girls are my oldest son Ryan’s girls. Sadly, Ryan is not with us anymore, He passed away in October 2013His eldest daughter is Skyla and she and I have a great relationship and always have, cours there were times in her youth that I thought I should have been able to have her more and should have been able to split the holidays up between the families. Skyla is 21 now and we have had a great relationship, until her mom seems to get involved and say or do things that are uncalled for. … But this is the way it is and I am used to it by now. However, Aurora the 4 year old whom has a different mom than sister Skyla is where my concerns lie now. Most recently I had Aurora for a full month at the other grandmother’s request, as her daughter, the mom of Aurora, relapsed again for maybe the 4th time since having her little girl 4 years ag. Spending her entire SS of $624.00 for Aurora from my son’s account on heroin I love Carrie the mom of Aurora and I want the best for her and her little girl… but my concern for Aurora’s health and wealth-fare are my top priority. In these past 4 years I have witnessed some scarey things, like Carrie having this couple she barely knows take care of Aurora and having Aurora way more than either of the grandparents couples involved. These people Leslie and Eddy Beliveau were persistently trying to take over the parent ship of Aurora and doing illegal things such as signing their name st school and the dentist office , pretending to be Aurora’s parents and even going to the point of having Carrie sign paperwork stating they can have and take Aurora out of state at their requests. I finally had enough and called the mother of Carrie the other grandma who lives in Florida with her husband, she flew up here immediately and got her daughter into Rehab and kicked all the junkies out of her house that she bought for Carrie and Aurora. She called me and my husband and asked us to take Aurora indefinitely, and we complied, we had her 4 weeks and now we haven’t been able to say hi or Face Time her at all! While she was with us, her momma and Grammie Face timed every single day and disrupted our routine, but we allowed it with no problems. But we had Aurora many times before this for 5-7 days and Momma never FT’d or called, if so, maybe once during the visitMy problem is this, while Aurora was here with us for a month I got her involved in Dance class an activity she was used to in CT with her mom or should I say her other mom, Aurora called Leslie the unrelated whomever mommy also!!!!!donrthing I did not agree to. She lives the Dance Class and she loves hanging out with me to be involved in this activity, , she also is on a waiting list for pre-school. Because when this first began the other Gramma wanted me to keep her , Aurora indefinitely until her daughter was clean and straightened out… But Mother was with daughter for exactly 2 days and daughter manipulated mom Into enabling her once again, paying her 5 months of bills and giving her anything she needs. Carrie as far as I know is not on any blockers to keep her off the Heroin and I am worried about Aurora’s safety. Also Carrie told me I could have Aurora on Thursday’s to take her to dance and now she hadn’t let me see her or talk to her in a week. I am heartbroken and in need of applying for Grandparental rights! Thank you, Sincerely yours, Anne E Colturi

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    • From Ivette on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      Yes, you can fight for grandparents visitation. I can tell you it’s been a battle for my husband and I. We just had court again today. Sad news I still, once again, cannot see my granddaughter. Another attorney to be retained and more days in court. I’m not into the holidays, it’s depressing knowing your grandchild is being manipulated by a schizophrenic mother who believes her own lies. We must pray and never give up hope, for our grandchildren’s sake.

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    • From Linda mustica on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      Sorry to hear that. When is the state and DCF and courts going to see that. I’m a grandma too. My son s been doing every drug out there. The kids are hurting the most. Grandparents are the spoilers. But when grandparents wants to be in the grandchild’s life there is a good reason. Look on line on all the children that died in parents hands. I cried looking at their little faces. I don’t want my grandsons photos on that page. Only when its too late the courts will wakeup. Its ashamed.

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  • From Alisha on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    My husbands parents are beyond irresponsible it’s genuinely concerning and I refuse to allow them to babysit. While their other grandchild was over not only did they allow someone to be there while on psychotropic drugs but he was doing them while he was there. They are always drinking, or smoking marijuana and constantly try to undermine me and my decisions as a parent. My husband thinks all of this behaviour is okay and thinks our child should be left alone with them. I find even the thought of it terrifying and appalling. If I have to I will take it to court so they are only allowed supervised visitation. My baby’s safety is more important than any of their feelings.

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    • From jodie mallet on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      I used to smoke weed before I had my child, but when you become a parent and make the decision to have a child, you have to stop all the childish things and become grown up and responsible. I will never touch weed again and my silly childish days are over. I’m a great mum and I don’t want my son knowing anything about drugs, let alone the fact his grandma takes them! Cringe. Also she gave my partner his first spliff at 14 years of age, so what’s stopping her from introducing my son to it! Grandma’s seen to think because they raised you, you have no right to make different rules for you’re children that they had for you.

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  • From Carole Theiley on What is an "Intact" Family?

    We have spent the last six years being with our grandchildren. We were the sole babysitters and as much as we adored our grandchildren they loved us also. My granddaughter used to beg me to stay. My daughter had decided to stop us from seeing the children because I I said that although I would love to babysit I did not want to stay overnight at her house. I had in fact just got back from the UK after being with my dying father and family. She then took the children for a sleep over with her abusive father. Something we were never allowed to do. My daughter had been making life difficult for some time and when I look back she and her husband had been bullying us and making us jump to her rules for some time beforehand. I know I maybe made some mistakes as a mother in the past but I had to manage an abusive relationship with her natural father as well as finally handling being a single mum. I have however always been a good grandmother and my daughter had said that herself. Now I am so depressed. My daughter does not talk to me at all and my life is just terrible without the children. As we head towards Christmas I just want to hide until it’s over. It’s just too painful

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  • From william Bracht on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    Can I get a copy of ct’s Grandparents visitation rights thank you- William Bracht-394 central Islip blvd-Ronkonkoma N Y 11779

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  • From Millard Mangis on Have a Favorite grandchild?

    You’re so cool! I don’t think I have read through a single thing like that before. So great to discover another person with a few original thoughts on this topic. Seriously.. thank you for starting this up. This website is one thing that is required on the internet, someone with a bit of originality!|

    http://www.QLWdkr2yrg.com/QLWdkr2yrg

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  • From ML on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I’m a grandparent of two toddlers with severe life-threatening allergies. It was when the oldest was 2 1/2 yrs old that we discovered her allergy to tree nuts: she ended up at the emergency room and then in the ICU. As a result of this experience and the changes which life threatening allergies require in the family’s daily routines my daughter’s anxiety over their wellbeing is palpable. If I could remove this burden from her and from other parents I would. It is obviously difficult for people to understand this problem when they don’t have direct experience with it. I recently had a family member who is a nurse decide not to join us for a family celebration because I asked that any food brought be dairy and nut free. It is painful to know that a medical professional is unable to to accept the fact that food allergies can be such a threat for small children who must trust the adults in their lives not to give them life-threatening foods. Please learn more about food allergies at https://www.foodallergy.org To the parent who wrote the original post, you have my sympathy and prayers for the safety of your children.

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  • From Cynthia Archer on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

    My husband and I adopted 3 of my husband’s grandchildren when their mother’s neglect and drug abuse caused the DHS to take the children. We were in a different state and it took 9 months to get the children out of foster care and into our home. We are blessed to have them but we know there is a reality to being 60 years old with a three year d to raise.There are no support groups where we live and we could use one!

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    • From FGP on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

      HI
      Many people who couldn’t find a support group started their own with an ad in the newspaper
      or getting the word around the community through schools, religious institutions etc…
      Good luck!

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  • From Rose on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    I have not seen my grandchildren in months and went for visitation did not get any visitation for my deceased daughters children The court feels that I am wasting my time .

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  • From Angel on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Trust your intuition as a mother. We all have that gut instinct and trust that feeling.

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  • From Linda mustica on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    I’m a grandmother of two grandsons ages 2 and 5 years old. I’ve been in their lives since birth. The mother walked out of their lives a little over a year. My son now has them. The five year old wasn’t talking. I got him started in school this year. He just starting to talk. My son won’t let the mother visit the boys unless she gave him 100 dollars. The five year old loves his mom.so now she can’t come up with the money. Now she don’t see them. He tells the boys she left them and don’t love them. I feel as a as a grandmother that this is hurting them mentally. Now I’m no longer allowed to see them. Those kids are like my own. Ive look upon them them three to four times a week. Its been a month now I haven’t seen them. I don’t know what to do. I know their not OK. The five year old only weighs 35 pounds. He s not eating. He’s not happy either. He told me he wants to live with me and grandpa. I really feel my son the father is doing drugs. What can I do.

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    • From LoriAnn on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

      I just came across your post and what you describe is emotional abuse by the father. I am not sure where you live, but you can advocate for them by contacting the school and speak with the social worker or psychologist about your concerns as well as your State Department of Children and Families. . Go to the court house and file a ” Motion For Intervention in Family matters” which can be found on your states Judicial website.

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  • From IQ Beauty on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Woman with graduate psychology training here… I wanted to chime in. I understand why the author wants to limit contact with her MIL. In fact, the author has been put in that position by her MIL. The author has stated her children’s needs several times over clearly to the MIL and has even experienced her child being hospitalized because of MIL’s bad decision. The MIL believes she knows better and the MIL has decided that she will put a child’s life in danger simply because the MIL doesn’t agree. This is very foul behavior on the part of the MIL and it is unacceptable. So, let’s take the MIL and DIL dynamic out of it and call them person A and person B. Person A has a child and person B wants to visit with the child. Person A tells person B what the child can be fed and why. Person B does not follow person A’s wishes and person B feeds the child something that almost causes the child’s death. Person A clearly states on several occasions what her child needs to be fed and person B keeps giving the child known allergens simply because person B wants to. Person B does not respect the child or the child’s health. Person A knows this and does not want her child to have a deadly reaction because of person B’s willfulness. Person A has tried to work with person B, but person B feels it’s her way or the highway and that she makes the rules. Person A decides to withhold her child from person B because person A does not want her child to have a potentially deadly reaction. Really, it is that clear cut. If you cannot see person A’s logic, then I do not know why. It really is cut and dry. Person A wants to protect her child. If person A knowingly were to keep giving her child to person B, then person A would certainly be a negligent mom. So, why do some readers have a problem with person A doing her job as a mom and doing what comes naturally to healthy moms– the need to protect their children? This is the part I do not understand. Person A is being a good parent.

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    • From Concerned Mother on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

      Thank you for putting this logically. I have been struggling with how to explain to my own parents why I won’t let them have unsupervised visits with my children despite telling them for years to stop being so reckless. Breaking it down into something similar (Person A and Person B) may help me explain it to them so that maybe they actually hear me finally instead of ignoring me and doing whatever they want to my kids.

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  • From vip patel on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I am dad of 2 college aged daughters now. However, I have tried my best to keep their maternal grandparents as much away from them growing up as possible. My younger daughter was abused by the grand father’s friend more than once in their house in the presence albeit not to their knowledge. And when my younger daughter who was 9 when she told me about it, I talked to them and they didn’t believe me or my daughter. They even scolded my daughter and told her to stop lying about the abuse. My wife and I went to the cops regardless (against their wishes/blessings) and filed a case. After a few months long investigation, the guy was convicted (surprisingly they found more victims) and was jailed for 15 years and is still rotting in there. This just proved how careless they were about their grandkids and were not the so-called loving and caring grandparents.

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  • From Joel Nerenberg on Have a Favorite grandchild?

    I haven’t checked in here for a while as I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are good quality so I guess I’ll add you back to my daily bloglist. You deserve it my friend

    http://www.ivNT1E34jG.com/ivNT1E34jG

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  • From William Scott on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Why is it always the father’s parents or the father done this the father is no good the father can have custody there’s no help for the father fathers don’t have no rights but you guys are sitting here talking about grandparents rights the man in this situation never has a choice

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  • From Flory Bagyinka on Grandparenting.org receives award from GRAND Magazine

    I don’t know where to start…i need help…my grandson was born in my home…i was present in his life from birth..his mommy died in a car accident when he was just 1yr and 7 mo…I raised him till 2013 when my son remarried…we were happy for them she came into this marriage w a daughter of her own 2 yrs older then our grand son…we were happy to get a granddaughter too…but not long into this marriage the step mom became hostile against us and didn’t alow us to visit ..our grandson suffered a lot…we too…then it was a little better. .so we were hopping thing will change when she’ll get to know us…our only son…we did everything in our power to help them we respected her rulles…but she is more and more nasty thourds us…it’s been 4 yrs and things get worth we suffer our grandson suffer…my son is in the middle doesn’t know how to deal with his wife…she is a power control frick…sorry…can’t see our grandson suffer anymore…he is 10 yrs old….now his first 7 yrs was in our care our home totaly depending on me and my husband…my son..his dad lived w us at the time but worked a lot…he is a good father..but cought up between wife and son…need advice…we are not getting any younger…we and our grandson need eachother to have a relationship…please help us

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  • From Debra george on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    I am a grandparent of 2 little boys one who’s 3 and another who was just born last week. My daughter and I have been close her whole life. We never cared for the man she is with but never let my daughter know. She had her first son by another man but this one she’s with know was the one who has been his father figure since birth. We may not care for him but commended him for being a good dad to our grandson. We could signed a mortgage so that they could get a house and have financially supported them throughout the process. He became ill and was hospitalized and out of work for several months in which we payed their mortgage so they wouldn’t loose the house. They have 2 new cars and have everything new in their home most of which I bought. I suffer from depression that started about 7 years ago. When my first grandson was born he helped me break free from that although occasionally I do go through spurts of which I am depressed but it doesn’t last more than a couple days. I don’t bother anyone most time I just sit quietly and cry when I’m alone. My daughter and my first grandson lived with us for the first 2 years of his life so we are very attached. My husband and I decided that I would continue to stay home even though I’m feeling better so that I could baby sit for my grandson and my daughter and her boyfriend can work being they have this new home that we helped them get. Well last week my daughter went into labor. I stayed with my grandson and her and her boyfriend went to the hospital. I texted my daughter’s boyfriend and asked how things were going and that when she went in to deliver to let me know and we would head up to the hospital. Alittle while later he texted me saying she’s going in for surgery and that they would be putting her under. Of course I immediately became concerned and asked him what was going on. He said he didn’t know and said ” don’t worry mom I got it” well I was nice and said ” I know you do. I trust you but please let me know anything she is my daughter and I am worried” I do know that this is not common even for someone having a c- section to put them under. I then packed up my grandson and went to the hospital. Thank God everything turned out okay and mom and baby were fine. A few days later I went to visit and noticed my daughter seemed upset with me. I asked her what was the matter. She snapped at me and asked what did you say to Orhan that’s her boyfriend. Long story short. He apparently found it offensive that I made the comment that she was my daughter. I was then informed that I am no longer able to see my grandchildren and that she wants nothing to do with me. I haven’t stopped crying. I truly have given my daughter a good life outside of me getting the depression both my children have grown up with everything. Including live support. I have defended them through their stupid dumb things they have done. I have been nothing but supportive and a loving mother. I have apologized profusely to her boyfriend for having upset him via text but clearly that wasn’t my intention. He informed me that ‘” we have built our new family and that I am not going to be in it and I need to respect that” . I went along and told him ” I can respect your new family but not at the cost of destroying mine” . My daughter has no friends he got mad at her best friend during her first son and told her she had to choose her friends or him. I never thought that this would happen to me. He has convinced her that I am controlling because of my statement about letting me know if anything happens in the hospital. I don’t get how this man can come in and take my world and get away with it. I know that it will never be the same between my daughter and me but I have spent every day with my grandson since the day he was born for 4 years. I only have seen the new baby once. I’m so torn I don’t know what to do.

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  • From Debra george on Newsflash! Connecticut Enacts Grandparent Visitation Law in July

    I know those who read my story must think there has to be more to this. It makes no sense that if her and her daughter had such a good relationship that she would just cut her off like that. I honestly am telling everything. I have told my husband several times that there was something about this guy I didn’t like but couldn’t out my finger on it. He is a bit of a story teller. He likes to brag about himself.bbut as much as I didn’t like that I always let it go. he told my daughter that I’m trying to control him . Yet his. Mother sleeps over there house because she is afraid to drive after dark and it drives my daughter crazy because she said she always gets involved in their fights and sticks up for her son. But when I brought that up to my daughter she for some reason can’t see it. I know I’m going on and on but I’m truly devestated over this. My neighbor who has watched me raise my children in this house for 28 years can’t believe she’s doing this. My husband is allowed to see my grandchildren but only if I am not here. I don’t want my grandson to loose us both so I will go somewhere when my grandson visits my husband otherwise my grandson will not be able to see eighter if us new rule per my daughter and her boyfriend. I will for the sake of my grandson. He loves his Mimi and pop pop and I don’t want him not to have that. So I will go out so he can come see him. I don’t know what my rights are. I’m afraid that they will us my depression against me if I try to get visitation rights which I don’t know if I have. Anyone who knows anything please help me.

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  • From TJax Smith on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    Just curious…. How many grandparents out there realize that if momma doesn’t like you, your grandchildren will get the same vibe simply by reading the emotions of their mommas. Instead of whining and complaining that you have rights, you are a victim, and how horrible your DIL is to you, a lot can be solved by realizing you will never have the relationship you want with your grandchildren if your DIL does not like you. She is strongly bonded to that child, and when momma is upset, baby gets upset. When momma sees a threat, baby starts to cry. Monkey see monkey do. If Momma is sick and tired of being treated badly, baby won’t be pleased to see you either. She won’t need to say a word either. My mother in law is reaping what she sewed. Years of backhanded, slanderous, manipulative games to destroy my marriage and reinstate her place as matriarch. I did not want to participate in her drama so I stopped talking to her and made my own choices based on my own conscience. I gave her time with my son, but supervised, after she used him to get attention and neglected him for a day. Any consequence she has ever gotten, she earned. Well my son did not like how she treated me, so he stoped talking to her too. She is now heart broken and dramatic, but no one can fix the mess she made. My two year old son objects to her attitude and out of love for his momma will not pay attention to her. You cannot harm the child’s momma and expect the child to love and trust you. Respect goes both ways, and the consequences of truly hurting your DIL may be higher than you are willing to pay. That is not a monster who stole your son. That is your grandchild’s Momma. Treat others the way you want to be treated, or get ready to reap the consequences. Sadly, those consequences are often higher than you are willing to pay.As for the mom above, if she doesn’t respect you, she has earned what she gets. Appeal the court order immediately, and get a lawyer if you need to. Most people with issues do not own mirrors, and cannot see what they are doing is wrong.Trust your instincts. Your husbands vows cut those apron strings. Grandmother is a far cry from mother, and it is your right to protect your kids. Instead of fighting you legally the proper way to handle the situation like an adult would have been to say she was sorry, to empathize, and earn your trust like any sane individual. The fact she is crossing such dangerous lines as serving food alergies and using manipulation while still insisting she is a victim means she is not your usual sane, mature individual. Put down your boundaries in a united front with your husband and fortify them. Make it clear how much she is damaging the relationship by her actions, straight from her son’s mouth. If she doesn’t get better set iron clad boundaries. She is dangerous by her actions so far.Trust is earned and so far she is the very definition of untrustworthy.

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  • From Terry and Janice Beauchamp on Long-Distance Grandparenting

    How can my wife and I stay in contact with her 10 grand kids and my ten grand kids and our eight children? She has three children and I have five. My closet child lives one thousand miles away and hers thirteen hundred miles away. We are limited on funds and it is very difficult to speak with each one of our kids and grandkids separately. Usually it is a confused conversation with kids and parents all trying at the same time to communicate on the phone and these phone call are not very frequent either. Our biggest situation is I made a commitment to my mother to live fairly close by until she passes some day. My wife and I are also bewildered as to where to move too some day to be closer to all of our families. Our kids are all spread out over five states. We both miss our kids and grandkids immensely and want to be a part of all of their lives! What do we do?

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  • From Rahul Vaid on A Grandchild's Love Letter to Her Deceased Grandfather

    I love my grandfather very much. He was the best person on the Earth.Every time I think of him I feel like crying but I am not able to express my emotions. He died on 3march,2017 with out any disease. Grand pa I miss you so much. Love you so much

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  • From Lynn Pelton on What is an "Intact" Family?

    My son and and his girlfriend had a baby together. They did not marry each other. I was thrown out of my son’s house. The mother remarried. I can see my grand daughter at her house ONLY! I can not have her by myself. She says I am welcome to visit at her home. I don’t know her very well, and I don’t not feel comfortable at her house. She and her husband live in HIS parents house and they have a baby together. How will I ever have a good relationship with my grand daughter?Neither will let her visit at MY house!

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    • From Constance Murray on What is an "Intact" Family?

      Your very blessed to have any access at all. Stop whining and count your blessings and thank God you get to spend time with your granddaughter and cherish every moment!✌️

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  • From Britt Robbins on Parents View: Why I Need to protect My children From My Husband's Parents

    I have to agree with the above comment. I am having trouble with my mother in law bad mouthing me to my own child…. He comes to me saying hey mommy Nana said she doesn’t like you she hates you but she loves daddy why doesn’t she like you…. Now most people would think that he is lying or stretching the truth except my child has aspergers and is painfully blunt and honest….. So what am I to do? Just let her bad mouth me to my four year old or cut her visitation….. I want him to have relationships with his family but only if they are healthy relationships…..

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  • From Leann Mercer on A Grandchild's Grief: When Grandparents Die

    I’m 35 years old and I lost my grandpa on Wednesday of last week andhis funeral is this coming Wednesday . My grandpa took care of me most of my life. Its killing me inside. Its hard on me. I’m angry and taking it out on my boyfriend. I haven’t really cried.

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